What’s this? The Bleiweiss talking about deck tech and other serious issues? Yup. Over the past week, I’ve been laid up with Mono. Let me tell you, having Mono sucks on any number of levels. I had to miss GenCon because of this sickness. I didn’t have the energy to do much other than get out of bed and stare at my computer screen. I spent a lot of time beating Suikoden I and II – these are two RPGs for the Playstation that I highly recommend tracking down and playing. They have aged well. I spent the rest of my waking hours playing a lot of Magic Online.
At first, I began playing Standard tournaments. I had retooled [author name="Jim Ferraiolo"]Jim Ferraiolo’s[/author] DNA deck – his Mind’s Desire Type 2 deck – with the addition of several Fifth Dawn cards. Here’s how the deck turned out:
DNA w/ 5th Dawn
Creatures:
4 Birds of Paradise
Spells:
2 Chain of Vapor
4 Chrome Mox
4 Concentrate
4 Explosive Vegetation
4 Mind’s Desire
4 Rampant Growth
3 Rude Awakening
4 Serum Visions
4 Spellweaver Helix
2 Tendrils of Agony
4 Thirst for Knowledge
Lands:
8 Forest
7 Island
2 Plains
Sideboard:
4 Akroma’s Vengeance
1 Chain of Vapor
3 Circle of Protection: Red
4 Naturalize
3 Temporal Fissure
If you’re new to the deck, the deck wins by accelerating its mana through cards like Rampant Growth, Explosive Vegetation, Chrome Mox, and Birds of Paradise. It then draws cards, and either casts Mind’s Desire or casts Spellweaver’s Helix, imprinting two sorceries. One of these sorceries is usually a card you have in your hand. There are many games where you discard said sorcery to Thirst for Knowledge, and then imprint that sorcery onto the Helix. Either way, you can end up with both Rampant Growth and Mind’s Desire imprinted on Spellweaver Helix, and your next Rampant Growth will trigger a large Mind’s Desire. Chain of Vapor can allow you to bounce multiple Chrome Mox and Birds of Paradise, both of which can be played easily to up the storm count. The game ends when you either cast Rude Awakening with a ton of lands in play, or cast Mind’s Desire, discard Tendrils of Agony to Thirst for Knowledge, imprint the Tendrils onto the Helix, and Tendrils your opponent for 20-30 life.
DNA is a lot of fun to play, but the deck has many complex interactions. Moreover, it has many weaknesses that eventually were insurmountable to overcome. For one, the deck loses horribly to aggro in its current configuration. I could not keep up with Goblins or Affinity. Since those two decks make up a large part of the Magic Online Standard metagame, DNA was hosed from the start. In addition, the Trinket Mage/Auriok Salvagers deck also completely destroys DNA, because that deck maindecks Scrabbling Claws. This deck virtually cannot win with an active Scrabbling Claws on the table, since the entire kill condition relies on getting cards into your graveyard. The only major matchup it played favorably against was Big Red – and that’s only because you could out mana-accelerate their land destruction and then side in Circles in the second game.
In general, I stopped playing the deck because it kept losing in the second round. Goblins? Lose to turn 3 Goblin Warchief/turn 4 Siege-Gang Commander. Affinity? Lose to turn 1 Disciple of the Vault. Trinket Mage deck? Lose to fourth turn Scrabbling Claws. Lose, lose, lose. On top of this, sometimes I’d lose because I had absolutely no kill condition outside of Tendrils. The board would be an absolute stalemate, and I could not find any cards to just”win” with – like a random Exalted Angel or the such. Serum Visions didn’t work well in the deck. I was about to take them out, when I thought”Hey, how about I just play some Block Constructed where I might play the best deck and win a bunch of packs?”
I haven’t played constructed in a long, long time. Sporadically I’ll sell my limited winnings on Magic Online to fund a Constructed deck. The last time I did this, pre-DNA was during Broodstar Affinity. I kept losing with that deck – this was pre-Darksteel and somehow I just couldn’t play the deck correctly. This time around Affinity was considered the best deck in the field, and one that could beat any deck. Rather than toy around with a good formula, I built [author name="Osyp Lebedowicz"]Osyp Lebedowicz’s[/author] Grand Prix-winning Affinity deck.
Osyp’s Vial Affinity
Creatures:
4 Arcbound Worker
4 Arcbound Ravager
2 Atog
4 Disciple of the Vault
4 Frogmite
4 Myr Enforcer
2 Myr Retriever
Spells:
4 Aether Vial
4 Chromatic Sphere
4 Cranial Plating
4 Thoughtcast
Lands:
4 Blinkmoth Nexus
4 Darksteel Citadel
1 Glimmervoid
3 Great Furnace
4 Seat of the Synod
4 Vault of Whispers
Sideboard:
1 Atog
1 Glimmervoid
3 Oxidize
3 Shrapnel Blast
4 Tree of Tales
3 Viridian Shaman
Osyp won Grand Prix: Orlando with this deck. Jeroen Remie, Eugene Harvey, Adam Horvath, Ty Dobbertin, and Brian Kibler all placed in the top 8 of Grand Prix: New Jersey with this deck. (To note: these players all tinkered with the deck a little bit, but all of them played decks that were essentially the same as Osyp’s deck). With such a proven track record against a field full of hate, how could this deck lose?
I’ll tell you how – it could be piloted by the world’s most incompetent Affinity player. I’ll cut straight to the chase – my final record with this deck was 2-12. That’s right; I only made it past the first round of an eight man tournament twice in fourteen tournaments! How did I keep losing so badly? I wish I could blame the Mono, but I can’t. The simple fact is that I must have played this deck wrong over and over. I’d watch replays and catch minor mistakes. I wouldn’t repeat these mistakes, but I would make new ones. It didn’t matter who I was playing against, what their rating was, or which deck they brought to the virtual table – I was Bleiweiss the Bye. I swear that’s my new screen name. Adept Zardoz saw that I was giving out free wins like a Olympic gymnastics judge, and changed my name to”Ben Gimpweiss the Bye.” Among my lowlights:
- Keeping a hand with triple land, double Aether Vial, Arcbound Ravager and Disciple, and proceeding to draw six straight lands.
- Playing Blinkmoth Nexus with a second one on the table, and activating the summoning sick one to attack with.
- Accidentally sacrificing Cranial Plating to Atog instead of equipping the equipment to said creature.
- Playing against R/G Freshmaker, and ending up with zero permanents on the table at the end of my turn for seven consecutive turns, even though I had played one or two permanents every turn of the game.
- Losing to turn 1 Disciple, turn 2 Disciple, triple Shrapnel Blast in the mirror match.
- Getting matched up against Tooth and Nail, and having the opponent say”your deck cannot beat mine in the first game” as he proceeded to cast a fourth turn entwined Tooth and Nail (thanks to multiple Cloudposts and Talismen) for Leonin Abunas and Platinum Angel.
- Losing game one against Krark-Clan Ironworks/Myr Incubator on the third turn, and losing the next game as the opponent played fourth turn Leonin Abunas, and proceeded to cast three Platinum Angels consecutively.
- Losing to U/W/G control as my opponent drew four Annuls by turn three, and then cast three consecutive Pristine Angels.
- Losing to Big Red repeatedly as they continually got the Electrostatic Bolt/Shatter/Seething Song out Arc-Slogger/Seething Song out fourth turn Furnace Dragon draws against me.
Obviously when you go 2-12 with the absolute best deck in the field, you begin to doubt your competency in the game of Magic. I know I did. I could not buy a win. Games I thought I had locked up suddenly slipped away. Other games I was outraced, and still more I was hated out of contention. I lost my entire supply of tickets. This was amazing, considering I’d been on a 12-0 streak in Limited in the 8/4 queues, and had picked up quite a few draft sets that I sold for 9-10 tickets a piece. I had to do the one thing that no Magic Online player wants to do.
I made the walk of shame to the Magic Online store.
Man, aside from buying the odd tournament deck for a sealed tournament, I hadn’t had to go buy myself new packs or tickets for quite a while. I felt dirty as I bought eighteen more tickets for my next three tournaments. I felt even dirtier as I lost 0-3 and bought another twelve. After those ran out, I finally realized the truth: I absolutely, positively suck at Magic. After a nice long bath and a break to play Suikoden 3 for a while, I came to a different conclusion – maybe Affinity wasn’t the deck for me?
With a new resolve, I decided to find a deck that would be both fun to play and would stand a chance in the 8-man brackets. One good thing about the Magic Online Block Constructed tournaments is that there are many diverse decks. In my fourteen games, I had played against Affinity, Big Red, U/G Crystal Shard/Eternal Witness, R/G Freshmaker, Tooth & Nail, KCI Ironworks Combo, U/G/W Pristine Angel control, and Trinket Mage/Auriok Salvagers. I hadn’t faced the other two accepted decks in the metagame – B/G control and the eventual deck I turned to for salvation.
Cheesequake.
You might know Cheesequake as the U/R control deck piloted by Josh Rider to a respectable 21st place finish at Grand Prix: New Jersey. He also finished the first day of that tournament undefeated in a field of nearly 1,000 players. More impressively, this is the guy who lost the Selecting 9th Edition Dilemma to me last week, made painfully clear right here. If a player of his limited persuasion skills could do so well with this deck, then it was the deck for me to try out in the Magic Online rooms.
Cheesequake a.k.a. Blue/Red Control
Creatures:
4 Arc-Slogger
3 Furnace Dragon
1 Megatog
4 Solemn Simulacrum
Spells:
4 Condescend
4 Electrostatic Bolt
4 Magma Jet
4 Seething Song
4 Thirst for Knowledge
4 Wayfarer’s Bauble
Lands:
4 Darksteel Citadel
4 Great Furnace
6 Island
8 Mountain
2 Seat of the Synod
Sideboard:
2 Echoing Ruin
3 Flamebreak
1 Furnace Dragon
3 Last Word
2 Megatog
4 Shatter
I liked playing this deck so much more than Affinity. It had game against every deck in the field – it could burn away Affinity creatures, wasn’t very vulnerable itself to the artifact hate of Freshmaker and U/G Shard, could counter key spells again Tooth and Nail, Ironworks, and B/G control, and could out-creature and out-counter Big Red. I began winning again – although I had dug myself into a huge hole with my Affinity venture, Cheesequake was the meal which nourished me back to a non-embarrassing 1650. Please, do not ask how badly I had fallen. Let’s just say that breaking 1600 was a cause for celebration.
How to Play the Deck
Cheesequake is the classic Counterburn style of deck – you spend the first few turns either countering spells or killing small creatures, all the while building up your hand and mana base with Thirst for Knowledge, Wayfarer’s Bauble, and Solemn Simulacrum. Then, you cast your big creature – Arc-Slogger, Furnace Dragon or Megatog, and ride that creature to victory. I’ve often come across with a seventh turn Megatog for twenty-one damage, or killed all of Affinity’s permanents with a well timed Furnace Dragon. Seething Song can be used to accelerate your kill condition, to cast a third turn Solemn Simulacrum, or to power out an impressively large Condescend.
Vs. Affinity
The game plan here is to burn out their early creatures, and hope to get an early Furnace Dragon. The first game is slightly against your favor, due to an inability to deal with an early Aether Vial. You might be able to kill a couple of their early guys, but your Condescends are useless. Try to mulligan aggressively in the first game to get to that Dragon. In the second game, I’ve been sideboarding as follows:
OUT:
-4 Arc-Slogger
-4 Condescend
-1 Megatog
-1 Solemn Simulacrum
IN:
+2 Echoing Ruin
+3 Flamebreak
+1 Furnace Dragon
+4 Shatter
The second game goes a lot more favorably for your deck. All of the dead cards have left, and all of the cards which can stall the game for a Furnace Dragon come in. Although they might kill your Furnace Dragon with a well timed Shrapnel Blast, your opponent will be left with zero to one permanents (depending on their Blinkmoth Nexus count) while you have multiple ways of getting through your deck left, including Thirst for Knowledge and Magma Jet. Don’t be afraid to Jet the opponent to reach your next Furnace Dragon or a Simulacrum – once you’ve landed the first Dragon, you have a lot more leisure time to win this game.
Vs. Big Red
Hug your Condescends until they go for their Arc-Slogger. You can outright lose if they play Arc-Slogger on the third turn via Seething Song. The first game is tough if you draw your small burn spells and not your mana acceleration and countermagic.
OUT:
-2 Electrostatic Bolt
-3 Furnace Dragon
In game two, you have nearly double the amount of permission spells as game one, and a much more viable creature base. Outside of Grab the Reins, Big Red does not have a good answer to Megatog. You can either outrace them with Seething Song or sit back with Last Words and Condescend to stop their early assault.
Vs. Tooth & Nail
All you have to do is stop their Tooth and Nail and they can’t win. It also takes them a while to build up to that against you, so you both can aggressively go for Arc-Slogger and then sit back on Condescend, drawing cards and playing Solemn Simulacrum at your leisure. Seething Song is key here, as Tooth and Nail can’t deal with a third turn Slogger or a fourth turn Megatog.
OUT:
-3 Electrostatic Bolt
-3 Furnace Dragon
IN:
+3 Flamebreak
+3 Last Word
This game becomes even more of a nightmare, as you can now sit on a full compliment of seven counterspells and control the match at your leisure. The first game was slightly in your favor. The second game is heavily in your favor. No need to rush – the only spells you really need to stop are Tooth and Nail and Mindslaver. Both of these are slow for their deck to get out, as you sit back and build your hand and mana with Baubles, Thirsts and Simulacrums. Feel free to Magma Jet into your key spells, as there aren’t many creatures that they drop that will be of bother to you. Flamebreak will usually take care of their rush if they try dropping multiple Viridian Shaman/Eternal Witness/Solemn Simulacrum for the kill.
Vs. U/G Shard/Witness
In this game, you have the advantage as they don’t really have great targets to kill – your lands and your Simulacrums are your only artifacts, and you have much better creatures then they do. Their best weapon, believe it or not, is Echoing Truth – it can neutralize Arc-Slogger and Megatog for a precious turn or two as they recur Eternal Witness and Thirst for Knowledge. You can kill most of their creatures in response to bounce/shard activations, counter their other threats, and eventually hit them with a large monster. Beware Rude Awakening, their only spell that can really kill you. Luckily, it is easily countered.
OUT:
-3 Furnace Dragon
IN:
+3 Last Word
The second game becomes a full on control battle, as they have Eternal Witness/Thirst for Knowledge with equal parts countermagic on both ends. You have ways to kill all their small creatures, and their Shamans are still pretty ineffective against you. Resolving a fourth turn Arc-Slogger with Seething Song is usually key, if they go for any spells early. The key is to not letting them recur their creatures. Hug your burn spells until they try to bounce – since Magma Jet and Electrostatic Bolt cost so little mana, you can usually have Counterspell backup if they try countering you kill spell.
Vs. B/G Control
The only spell that can wreck you is Death Cloud. If you counter Death Cloud, they can’t win. You have virtually nothing to fear against this deck, as all their hate is dead against your deck, excepting your lands. This match is heavily in your favor.
OUT:
-4 Electrostatic Bolt
-3 Furnace Dragon
IN:
+3 Flamebreak
+3 Last Word
+1 Megatog
The second game is even more lopsided than the first. With seven control spells and Seething Song to accelerate your threats, B/G isn’t really designed to keep up. Their Terrors come into play here, but with your superior card drawing and control capabilities, you can often wait this deck out for quite a while before going for a counter-backed win.
Vs. R/G Freshmaker
They can’t beat you. Their Green is useless against your lack of artifacts, and your red creatures are larger than their red creatures. You can drop an Arc-Slogger safely on the third to fifth turn, and ride it to victory behind a hail of burn and countermagic.
OUT:
-2 Electrostatic Bolt
-3 Furnace Dragon
With two additional large creatures that R/G can’t handle, and three more counterspells to stop their Fireballs, this game is even worse for them than the first.
Vs. Trinket Mage/Salvagers
The first game of this match goes about 50/50 – it’s good to aggressively mulligan into either card drawing or countermagic, so that you can stop an early Salvagers. It’s the only card in the deck that can hurt in the end, but unlike B/G’s Death Cloud, this deck can accelerate through to its threats much more quickly thanks to the huge number of cantrips it contains. Furnace Dragon is more useful in this match than most others, though Aether Spellbomb is their biggest threat outside of the Auriok Salvagers themselves.
OUT:
-1 Electrostatic Bolt
-1 Seething Song
-4 Solemn Simulacrum
IN:
+3 Flamebreak
+3 Last Word
Game two goes about 50/50 as well – they have sided in countermagic and more bounce, while you have more countermagic and ways to kill multiple Trinket Mages at once. This match is also is a test of patience – you have to counter the Salvagers at all costs. You can accelerate your mana more quickly thanks to Thirst for Knowledge and Seething Song, but don’t be tempted to go for the quick kill here – just sit it out and build up your hand patiently. You want to be able to either counter the Salvagers, or tap them out with Condescend and then kill the Salvagers with burn.
Vs. KCI Combo
Mulligan aggressively into Furnace Dragon, because otherwise you aren’t winning game one. You can’t kill their artifacts without the Dragon, and Condescend is useless against the obscene mana acceleration this deck features – you can’t race 8-10 Talismen, 4 Pentad Prisms, and the Krark-Clan Ironworks itself. On the other hand, KCI doesn’t usually play any disruption, so aiming for that Furnace Dragon hand (whether with or without Seething Song) is your goal, since you can Magma Jet and Thirst for Knowledge your way into mana acceleration. This game is a race to see if you can drop the dragon before they get off their combo.
OUT:
-4 Arc-Slogger
-4 Condescend
-4 Electrostatic Bolt
-1 Megatog
IN:
+2 Echoing Ruin
+1 Furnace Dragon
+3 Flamebreak
+3 Last Word
+4 Shatter
The second and third (if necessary) games are a lot more comfortable, as you can stifle their early mana development while building up to Furnace Dragon. Shatter and Echoing Ruin can double as Incubator kill cards, which you can follow up with a Flamebreak. Last Word stops both the Incubator and Goblin Charbelcher, allowing a more solid counter than the mana-dependant Condescend. This match goes from moderately in their favor to moderately in your favor.
Vs. U/G/W Pristine Angel
Another 50/50 match, if only because their real threats are so slow. This deck is basically U/G shard except with less bounce (your nemesis) and more large creatures – the Angel itself. U/G/W is particularly vulnerable to a quick Seething Song win, and their kill condition is easily stopped with Condescend. They don’t usually run the Eternal Witness/Thirst for Knowledge engine which can stymie you against U/G Shard, so you can match them on mana acceleration and kill them on card advantage and slightly quicker beats.
OUT:
-2 Electrostatic Bolt
-3 Furnace Dragon
Megatog rules game two, as it can trample all over Pristine Angel all day long. 4/4 protection from everything flyer? Good luck facing down a 21/22 trampler backed with Arc-Slogger and Magma Jet damage. You can outdamage, outcounter, and outbreakthough the U/G/W deck, as Megatog provides an answer to their defenses.
Good luck with Block Constructed everyone! I’ve been having a lot of fun with this Blue/Red Cheesequake deck, and I absolutely will never touch a non-Red card with the word”affinity” printed on it ever again. I got to play more Constructed Magic during my downtime than I had in months, and I highly recommend that everyone try to fit in at least one PTQ before the season ends. Come out to Richmond this weekend to compete in our last PTQ of the block season. It’ll be a blast!