Ask Ken, 05/20/2004

Today’s question is answered by Ghetto Fabulous – man’s man, ladies man, and man about town.

Well, I am not one to start a column without an intro so despite Gerard Fabiano answering today’s question, you will still get a piece of my mind. It isn’t always easy to find guest writers, especially one per week, but don’t you worry, I have a lot in the pipeline, and I am sure you won’t be disappointed. That sensation of nails across a chalkboard can mean one of only two things. Either I am having another high school nightmare, or Gerard is about to answer a little Reader Mail! Hey!

Today’s letter comes to us from the city of brotherly love. A frustrated Bride to be writes:

Dear Ken,

Why? Why are people so insane for this stupid game? My fiancé plays this game and I really can’t understand the attraction (seriously you are stuck in a room full of smelly men and generally without a woman in sight).  I’m embarrassed that my soon to be husband plays this game, but my attempts to get him to stop have been unsuccessful.  Any suggestions for getting the piles of cardboard stacked everywhere out of my house forever?  He keeps rambling about his Alpha set, can you find someone that I could dump them on, I can’t stand the mess!?  I’ll sell the whole lot for 10 bucks. Just get them out!


Frustrated in Philly

Dear Mrs. Frustrated:

Insane“ “Stupid Game!” What are you talking about? Okay, just joking, your question is very common among women who are attracted or involved in a relationship with a hard-core gamer. Questions like,”Why would he rather spend his Saturday to win a little blue envelop when he can be spending time with me?” are frequent occurrences. Well, the answer is that Magic is more than just a stupid game that may drive someone insane, it is actually a way of life.  Think about it for a second, how many friends does your fiance have that also plays Magic? Probably a fair amount, and he would have never met these friends if he didn’t play Magic.

This is my third year on the Pro Tour and I made more friends in the past three years than I did in my whole life. There is truth to the fact that some Magic players may smell a little, some may smell a lot, some even may smell worse than Antonio De Rosa’s PayLess boots, but a lot of Magic players are real good guys and will be behind you when the going gets tough. Think about it… I am sure everyone has that friend that you always money draft with or drive to PTQs together. Will you drive an hour out of the way to pick up your friend for a tournament? I did it, and I am sure most of you would too.

So Mrs. Frustrated (if that is even your real name), if your finance is happy playing Magic, let him play! Just make sure he balances his love for the game and his love for you. As far as selling all of his Alpha cards, well StarCityGames.com buys cards all the time! So there you have it, I hope I helped you out with your situation, and I am sure my words of wisdom has brought a smile to your face, if not maybe this will:

What did 50 Cent (the rapper) say to the sewing lady?

Gee you knit?

Gerard Fabiano

Any more questions? Need some more jokes or maybe have a good joke? E-mail [email protected]