[Editor’s Note: The content herein is unabashedly lies, damned lies, and statistics. Believe what Joe Black says at your own peril.]
Dear Osyp,
I heard that Mike Turian recently got the new R&D job that Wizards had been advertising. I was just wondering would you or any other Pro still playing the game ever consider taking a job in R&D, or is playing on the Pro Tour too important?
Sincerely,
Randy from Renton
Dear Randy,
I was really happy to hear that my good friend Mike got the job at Wizards – I’m sure he’ll make some good contributions to the game. From what I hear, working at Wizards is a gamers dream, and I certainly considered applying. Unfortunately, having to give up competitive Magic is something I’m not quite ready to do yet, so I decided against applying as of right now. Most of the people who applied for the position are Magic players, but few Professionals. However, there is one professional who applied for the position that I know of, and through some wrangling, I managed to actually get a copy of the resume he submitted.
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Joseph Gary Wise Professional Gamer
Toronto, CA 12115
918-454-7811
Education:
BA in film from McMaster University
Professional Skills:
Friends with Kai Budde
Friends with Bob Maher
Friends with Neil Reeves
Friends with Dirk Baberowski
Friends with Mike Turian
Experience:
Played Magic the Gathering well for 2 years
Played on the Pro Tour for 7 years
Accomplishments:
Helped Mike Turian win a Pro Tour
Cracked pocket aces with K 10 off
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It’s a shame he didn’t get the job, but there’s always next time.
Sincerely,
Osyp”Joe Black” Lebedowicz