"Ugh. This place gives me the creeps.
Some people are repulsed by the Golgari or the Rakdos, but I’ll tell you this: I’d rather be sitting in other people’s filth than in filth that is of indiscernible origin. At least I know what I’m sitting in!
I’ve been back to the Simic Growth Chamber a few times since my childhood, and I still don’t like it here. It feels like a hospital. Everything’s cold and metallic (except, you know, covered in ooze), and the doctor in charge is a Laboratory Maniac, obsessed with cramming animals together like puzzle pieces, instead of a Master Healer. Instead of fixing you, they want to "improve" you. I find it terribly unpleasant.
Not to mention the fact that my quarry this time isn’t some Fool’s Tome. It’s a frog… lizard… thing. But it’s sentient, apparently. Some evolutionary missing link, I guess. But the fact of the matter is whatever I’m supposed to be lifting is alive. My job here might as well be Abduction. I’m a thief, not a damn kidnapper! I’d much rather pilfer a Spellbook than a talking dinosaur baby.
No Security Blockade to prevent me from taking…whatever it is. But I’d rather deal with a few guards than babysit."
–research notes, journal XXVIII, page 103
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Eureka! What a discovery! It’s Simic Week, aka (Crab)Shark Week! That means we are hailing evolve, graft, Momir Vig, Heartbeat combo, and the dichotomy between spells and creatures in one of Magic’s most diametrically opposed color combinations! In fact, according to early estimates, Simic was the most popular guild at Prereleases and one of the best in terms of win percentage. To that end, Simic Initiates took to social media to show their support:
Ready to evolve some crabs! #MTGGTC twitpic.com/byi83o
— Brian Kibler (@bmkibler) January 26, 2013
— Dave E (@NewCardSmell) January 26, 2013
Alright, time to go punch people in the face with mermaids. #Simic #MTGGTC
— Not Robert Kirkman (@RobersKirkman) January 26, 2013
What’s inside! …other than a Fathom Mage. twitter.com/priceofprogres…
— Nathanial Price (@priceofprogress) January 26, 2013
Going Simic for the prerelease. One of the other guilds would probably have been better, but Simic is just soo fun. #FrogCrabLizzard
— Brionne(@snapplecoffee) January 26, 2013
Crabtree would make an awesome #Simic #MTG creature type.
— Ryan Gwynne (@gwynne0211) February 4, 2013
If I were playing Simic at the Prerelease, I’d make sure to bring a link cable for the kind soul who wants to help Evolve my Graveler.
— Joe Spanier (@FoundOmega) January 26, 2013
Ready for the employee prerelease! #mtggtc #simic twitter.com/EthanFleischer…
— Ethan Fleischer (@EthanFleischer) January 24, 2013
For those that were worried – of course I played Simic at the employee prerelease. #mtggtc twitter.com/maro254/status…
— Mark Rosewater (@maro254) January 24, 2013
I hope all the #simic players are doing well at their Gatecrash prereleases.
— Sam Heckman (@SamHeckman) January 26, 2013
I love #Simic so much that I couldn’t cut cards… playing a 45 card deck. #PoorLifeChoices #WishMeLuck
— Tifa Meyen (@TifaMeyen) February 4, 2013
2-0 at midnight prerelease for #mtggtc. Simic owns bones.
— Travis Allen (@wizardbumpin) January 26, 2013
4-0d the second flight with Simic. Evolve’s a very real mechanic.
— Christian Calcano (@CCalcano) January 26, 2013
3-0 in my Gatecrash prerelease with Simic. Doing @top8games proud. #mtg
— Alex Ullman (@nerdtothecore) January 26, 2013
After seeing it play – I am very, very surprised Master Biomancer is not Leg…wait for it…dary. #MTGGTC. What are ur thoughts on him?
— Natalie (@CardboardNirvan) January 27, 2013
@bmkibler Funny, my first thought when I saw that was if I could abuse it with evolve.
— brendan weiskotten (@bweisko) January 27, 2013
Wow actually, Simic is looking really awesome. Such interesting mechanics. I love Unexpected Results and Prime Speaker Zegana
— Kiri Fuzzbutt (@TheBetaWolf) February 4, 2013
Final counts from all @scgamecenter #MTGGTC prereleases: 73 Boros players, 31 Dimir, 49 Gruul, 63 Orzhov, 74 Simic.
— Jennifer Dery (@Legenndery) January 27, 2013
A long, long time ago, I can still remember. How that Twitter used to make me smile. And I knew if I had my chance, that I could make those people Tweet, and maybe they’d be happy for a while…
Event Coverage Coordinator and Twitter Admiral for StarCityGames.com
Listen to the @InContention podcast! It’s the official podcast of the StarCityGames.com Open Series with @kstube, @affinityforblue, and myself. Listen in at InContentionMagic.com. Our most recent episode, Orange Rush, can be found here.