Speaking In Fake Scottish Accents: Type 1.X Highlander Report

We had previously had a Highlander tournament that was 1.5 (no restricted cards allowed), but found that we didn’t have that fulfilled feeling that we get when playing with Moxes and other assorted broken. (Mark Rosewater says it’s Moxes, so Moxes it is, folks. Check it out at Question Mark if you don’t believe me.) (I believe you, but I still prefer the rogue "Moxen" and "Wumpi" — The Ferrett)

Of course, we wanted SOME balance, so we wound up banning cards that would unbalance the format. It must be clarified that the format had, how shall I say, some difficulties to overcome if it were to be enjoyed?

So, here is the format in ALL ITS GLORY:

* 16 Creatures Minimum
* All sets allowed in Type 1
* Highlander format (all decks must be approved by Christopher Lambert, and you must speak in a fake Scottish accent like Sean Connery)
* 5 card sideboard

The following cards were banned, for obvious reasons:

Moat
The Tabernacle At Pendrell Vale
The Abyss
Ensnaring Bridge
Drop of Honey
Vile Consumption
Thawing Glaciers
Shaharazad
Time Walk
Time Twister
Balance
Mind Twist
Portcullis (Hello – it’s BAROKEN)
Yawgmoth’s Will
Voltaic Key
Mana Vault
Memory Jar
Library of Alexandria
Maze of Ith
Candelabra of Tawnos
Humility

And you could have one, but not ALL of any of the following sets of cards:
Any Tutor
Fact or Fiction or Ancestral Recall
Dream Halls or Doomsday
Fastbond or Crop Rotation
Any one Mox and a Mox Diamond
Necropotence or Yawgmoth’s Bargain
Stroke of Genius or Braingeyser

I’m sure you’re wondering "What kind of crack is this guy on? You have to play sixteen creatures AND you can’t play with Vile Consumption?" There is a method to my madness, my friends. I wanted a format where the predominant kill was creatures, but where you could still flex your muscles and slap down a $250 card if you really wanted to.

A format where men were men, women were women, and cards were pieces of cardboard that you threw against a wall when you were done with them. A format where the DCI didn’t have a say – where you could gunsling against a stranger and catch them with their pants down. A FORMAT THAT SHOULD BE SANCTIONED! (Hear! Hear! — The Ferrett)

Since I wouldn’t be so foolish as to post a decklist BEFORE the tournament, here is the full list, and a brief rundown of the situation and synergies that the deck presents:

"I’m a Highlander and I’m okay."

1x Ali From Cairo
1x Time Spiral
1x Beta Braingeyser
1x Hammer of Bogardan
1x Lightning Bolt
1x Silver Wyvern
1x Mahamoti Djinn
1x Diamond Valley
1x Lightning Dragon
1x Annul
1x Ogre Enforcer
1x Scrying Glass
1x Shock
1x Arcane Denial
1x Thalakos Drifters (Hill Giant AND Shadow!)
1x Incinerate
1x Earthquake
1x Prohibit
1x Man-o’-War
1x Bribery
1x Archivist
1x Old Man of the Sea (BROKEN with Diamond Valley)
1x Nevinyrral’s Disk
1x Planar Portal (A Demonic Tutor every turn is strong, I hear…)
1x Dust Bowl (Essential in this format)
1x Flying Man
1x Temporal Adept
1x Capsize
1x Jade Statue
1x Time Warp
1x Ogre Shaman
1x Blizzard Elemental
1x Mirror Universe
1x Pillage
1x Black Lotus
1x Back to Basics
1x Mana Leak
1x Barrin, Master Wizard
1x Evacuation
1x Phantom Monster
1x Counterspell
1x Serendib Djinn
A bunch of Islands and Mountains

Here are the other participants and their decks:

Dennis "Obi-Wan" Croucher, playing Blue-White
Jeff "Slow Hand" Measures, playing a 4-colour deck with Gwendolin Di Corci :p
Frank Compain, playing Rec-Sur (!) with craziness
Kenny G. Gallagher, playing Blue Red with Gilded Drake tech
Alex Anderson, playing Mono-Green
Jon Barrett, playing Sliver Academy
Brendan Cox, playing Green Blastoderm madness with Bribery splashed
Cartman, playing random.dec
Felix Tse, playing Yawgmoth’s Bargain–Replenish
Jony 2000, playing Blue-White control
Sam Doyle, playing Blue-White control
Victor Yan, apparently playing Green Stompy
Jason Wiles, playing 3 or 4-colour Jank

And here’s the matchups I went through – some nightmarish, some easy, some just confusing. The best part of this format is that the creature intensiveness makes combo strategies less reliable, while at the same time it still lets with abusive card-drawers and silly cards like Black lotus. It was a LOT of fun, even getting pounded by Blastoderms. More on that later…

Round 1 vs. Kenny G

Kenny is an extremely cool guy who drives me around far too often. He is addicted to brokens, so I know I will crush him because my deck has Back to Basics. ‘Nuff said.

Game 1

We go back and forth at the start. I play a Flying Man, he mizes. Heh… Just kidding. He Lightning Bolts my Old Man of the Sea, then Bribery gets my Lightning Dragon, and plays one of his own. I lose horribly.

Game 2

We both manage to get some threats out, but he plays a Gilded Drake to take my Mahamoti Djinn – and that spells game, unfortunately. This game was lot closer than it would appear, but I was unable to sneak out Barrin to stop the Drake. Boo.

Round 2 vs. Frank (0-2, 0-1 rounds)

Frank is pure craziness. He is one of the founding members of Team Psyduck (with myself and Jeremy Saint) and a cool guy to boot. His Demonic Hordes–Instill Energy deck is legend. I am playing with Mirror Universe, so I know I can kick his butt.

Game 1

I get totally land-hosed; he gets an early Survival of the Fittest, fetches Squee, Goblin Engine, and gets an Avalanche Riders to aggravate my mana screw. I manage to get some cheap threats out, but he had a Recurring Nightmare in play and I concede.

Game 2

I manage to Annul his Survival of the Fittest, and get an Ogre Shaman out, which kills his Birds of Paradise and Utopia Tree. He gets quite a few blockers, but I get a Lightning Bolt and Shock and finish him with Stormbind-dude.

Game 3

At this point we only have about 5 minutes left in the round. Since rounds are decided by life total in the event of a draw, I hope to burn the punk as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, my plans are foiled by an Early Survival of the Fittest. I do manage to get a Mirror Universe out while I’m down on life, but he fetches the Sex Monkey and crushes it. Ali from Cairo doesn’t go the distance for me; I lose horribly.

Round 3 vs. Slow-Hand Measures (1-4, 0-2 rounds)

Jeff and I have a good-natured rivalry that dates several years – he has been ribbing me good-naturedly ever since rumours of his slow play have emerged. He is a thoughtful and fun player, which lends him to play Blue-White. I am pretty sure I will crush him because I am playing with Ogre Enforcer. ‘Nuff said.

Game 1

I drop a Lotus and an Island. I have Fat Moti, Back to basics, Time Spiral and Ogre Enforcer in hand. What to do? Play the Moti turn 3? Play Back to Basics? Spiral on turn 2 and hope for the best? Play the Ogre Enforcer turn 2 and Smash him? Oh lord, why can’t Black Lotus produce FOUR mana?

I play Back to Basics on a hunch that Jeff is playing a lot of Dual lands. Jeff nearly explodes, and I have a slow few turns. If I recall he played Gwendolyn di Corci and started crushing my hand. My memory is hazy but I think I won this game.

Game 2

I remember Jeff Bribing a Blizzard Elemental and me crying like a little baby. All bad and I mize – I mean lose – in short order. Boo 🙁

Game 3

I get Back to Basics and a Mahamoti Djinn out. I start laying the beats when Jeff plays a Serendib Efreet and starts stabilizing. Dennis walks up behind me and says, "Why don’t you Obliterate and win? You have the most life!" An aside here: I decided to give the match to the player with highest life when I saw some matches weren’t over even after forty minutes. This would come back to haunt me…Anyway, I Obliterate and win.

Round 4 vs. Brendan "Leaf Boy" Cox, playing Blast-o-Smash with Bribery tech 🙁
Record Games 3-5, Matches 1-2

Brendan is evil. He cheers for the pitiful Toronto Maple Leafs, while I cheer for the powerhouse Montreal Canadiens. Don’t let the standings fool you; 28th place means nothing in the NHL. 🙂 I know that I cheer for the right team and have Ali from Cairo in my deck, so I know I will win.

Game 1

I drop a Mahamoti Djinn and a Blizzard Elemental, while he has puny elves. I crush his leafy butt.

Game 2

He plays Blastoderm! I have no answers. I tell him I will crush and ask him to concede. He laughs at me. I tell him to NOT attack with Blastoderm if he is a man, he hits for fifteen, Bribes a Mahamoti… And I lose. Stupid Blastoderm.

Game 3

I know I will win the match because, well, I weigh about 800 pounds more than Brendan, and if he wins I will flip the table, as per Team Psyduck regulations. Thankfully it never comes to that and I manage to eke out a win thanks to flying creatures. Yay me!

Conclusion

It was fun. I won two Imaginary Pets, thanks to prize support demi-deity Danny Gorny. I went 2-2, and I got to play with Ali from Cairo and Mahamoti Djinn in a tournament deck. And I got to write a cool report with no inserts from the Ferrett! (Isn’t that swell? — The Ferrett)