Insert Column Name Here – The Casual Player’s Bargain-Hunting Guide, Part 11

As we run into the final blocks for the Casual Player’s Bargain-Hunting Guide, Kamigawa and Mirrodin, we run into an interesting conundrum; as the blocks became more mechanic-oriented, whole types of cheap cards became available.

Which is to say that for every block since Masques, there’s been a “pre-made” deck lurking in the wings for you. Take Shards of Alara, where Wizards practically screamed, “You can build a Shard deck, you know!” and then handed you a list of all the Jund cards that were guaranteed to work together.

Masques, I’d argue, would be the first block where that deck showed up (it Rebels), followed by Invasion’s Domain deck (recently resurfaced in Conflux). Then we had Threshold, Madness, and Tribal. For a while, Wizards got a little crazy and made the decks so flat-out obvious that it was like having a deck handed to you; here, have an Affinity deck!

So let’s talk, briefly, about the mechanics of these sets and how they work for casual play.

Affinity
Great in three-player games, where you can still blitz past people’s defenses; not so great as it scales upwards. Affinity works in Extended, where you can come out of the gates quickly enough to deal twenty in a handful of turns… But in multiplayer, where the goal is to deal eighty in a handful of turns, the Affinity deck’s Fundamental Turn dips. As such, casual Affinity decks tend to die to large groups.

Modular
Surprisingly, Affinity’s overlooked sister (aside from the power of the too-expensive-to-be-a-bargain Arcbound Ravager) fares far better in multiplayer than it does in duels, with plankton cards like Arcbound Crusher turning out to be huge threats and Arcbound Reclaimer getting your guys back, then Cranial Plating cleaning up for the win.

Spirit
Surprisingly, the Spirit decks tend to be all right — not powerful, but cards like Long-Forgotten Gohei really help bulk it up, the soulshift mechanic provides for some veeeeery slow recursion, and Infernal Kirin alone can do nasty things to people’s potential plays. In addition, the ki cards actually can trigger nicely, with Waxmane Baku being particularly useful, and Tallowisp is a solid engine to fetch toolbox enchantments, and Thief of Hope buys you time and pecks away, and Kami of the Waning Moon can help punch through that final damage.

It’s not great by any means, but it’s not as bad as you’d think it would be.

Aether Snap
Flexibility: 3
Price: 7
Overall: 4

Honestly, I’d like this a lot more if it cost the same as a Damnation, not a mana over it. That said, in multiplayer, one of the best ways to generate virtual card advantage is to use tokens, and this kills tokens dead in their tracks. Also, between Ravnica’s Simic guild, Mirrodin’s modular, Alara’s Jund shard, and the happiness of such recent casual hits as Blood Tyrant and Bloodhall Ooze, universally stripping +1/+1 counters can be handy.

Sadly, the expensive mana cost relegates this to a metagamed card to be used when tokens start to get out of control (and it doesn’t remove the source of the tokens, so that Centaur Glade may start pumping ‘em out again). Yet it’s still a handy card to have in your arsenal for when you need it.

(Note that I did not attempt to say, “Oh, snap!” in an attempt to be clever. This is the hallmark of a professional writer. You’re welcome.)

Arashi, the Sky Asunder
Flexibility: 4
Price: 6
Overall: 4

Warning: Though Arashi’s art shows a kind of flying thing, and though Arashi’s card text mentions flying twice, Arashi herself does not fly. Why do I know this? Because I’ve seen at least three players think that she flies, and were sadly surprised to watch the little birdies go sailing by overhead.

(Come on, you know she’s a she. Look at that smokin’ body!)

That said, Arashi is a narrow but sometimes necessary way of getting rid of fliers. Yes, you can play with Squall Line, which also finishes players off, but a) Squall Line often finishes you off as well, b) Squall Line can’t block in a pinch, and c) Squall Line can be countered. Barring something like Stifle, a channel effect will slide right under any counterspells.

The problem with Arashi is that there is Squall Line, leaving you to decide which effect will better fit in your deck. If you’ve got a counterspell-heavy environment where people are relying on Mahamoti Djinns to destroy you, then hey, go for this.

Barter in Blood
Flexibility: 7
Price: 8
Overall: 8

Forcing everyone to sacrifice two creatures is, generally, a Wrath of God effect, particularly if cast on turn 4 or 5. As a bonus, it destroys even indestructible guys. Having four of these and four Innocent Bloods makes it very hard for any creature to stick, and as such a full complement of each are critical in The Mono-Black Deck.

Since I believe everyone should have a Mono-Black Deck for cheap, elegant power, this is a must-have for me.

Cloudpost
Flexibility: 7
Price: 7
Overall: 7

Coming into play tapped makes Cloudpost considerably worse than its cousins the Urzatron lands (Urza’s Mine, Urza’s Power Plant, and Urza’s Tower). However, it is effective in a slower deck, netting you four mana if you happen to get two out — and hey, who doesn’t like having sixteen mana off of four lands?

This mana-scaling makes it vital in a Big Dumb Artifact Deck, a deck that relies on large amounts of crazy mana from Cloudposts and the Urzatron to function, which I really should write about when I finish this series. Remind me if I don’t get ‘round to it, okay, guys? Thanks.

Remember: Professional writer.

Confusion in the Ranks
Flexibility: 1
Price: 6
Overall: 2

This is a card that attracts two kinds of people: The folks who will go out of their way to try to break this effect, and the other kind.

The guys trying to break this effect will, sadly, come away disappointed. Yeah, you can use things like Norrin the Wary to take advantage of it, but I’ve seen the Confusion in the Ranks decks and they’re fragile as all heck. If someone has a token generator, you’re often screwed, and even if not, you can still die to a Naturalize effect at the right time. (Still, if you’re looking for ideas, hit up Mark Gottlieb.)

The other kind just want to mess with people, upsetting the state of the game to cause maximum chaos. I like these people. They force folks to stay on their toes, making games much more unpredictable and throwing monkey wrenches in everyone else’s plans even if they don’t win. I support these folks’ brave effort to cause maximum fun at the sacrifice of their own victories, and it is in tribute to them that I mention this card.

Damping Matrix
Flexibility: 3
Price: 6
Overall: 4

The problem with Damping Matrix is that it’s hard to take advantage of it; either you have a deck with no activated effects at all, which tends to be a much weaker deck, or you wind up as hamstrung as your opponents.

That said, Damping Matrix is one of those cards that often will absolutely decimate an unwary opponent who’s built his deck incorrectly. Many multiplayer decks, in an attempt to squeeze as much card advantage out as they can, place everything in reusable creature- and artifact-based effects — and then wind up being able to do bupkiss when this card hits. It’s what I call the “Humility” effect, wherein one card can nerf a guy who’s followed solid multiplayer strategies perhaps a little too slavishly.

As such, it’s worth having just in case you need it. Watch what your friends are playing, and slip this in if they get a little too dependent on the ol’ activated effects.

Be warned, however, that cards like this will generate debates about what exactly count as activated effects. Have a judge resource handy!

Darksteel Colossus
Flexibility: 6
Price: 1
Overall: 6

The Big Slag-Heap is, last I checked, $13.50. This is stupidly expensive for a single card in a Bargain-Hunting Guide, where the goal is to get four playables for under a dollar.

But come on. It’s Darksteel Friggin’ Colossus. It is, perhaps, one of the most iconic Casual creatures in existence, the near-perfect confluence of Timmy and Spike, an indestructible stomping gold-durned robot that can kill you in two hits. And it is, I should add, a staple of the Big Dumb Artifact Deck.

That said, the printing of Path to Exile may lower peoples’ expectations of this, and of course nobody likes it when your Colossus is swiped by some Control Magic effect. But honestly, though the flexibility is closer to a 3 or a 4, the thrill you get when you slam this down onto the table is one of the most satisfying Timmygasms of all time.

Worth owning one. I still don’t have a whole set. Some day.

Duplicant
Flexibility: 5
Price: 4
Overall: 4

At six mana, this is (like much of Mirrodin) just a mana overpriced, but this is both a removal spell and potential beefcake all at once. Is that Akroma, Angel of Wrath too much for you to handle? Well, have a snack, kid, ‘cause your Duplicant is going to town.

Sadly, after engorging himself on a tasty Angel, your Duplicant will not have trample, or flying, or anything much of interest at all aside from now possessing the creature type “Angel.” (Hey, it could be handy. Though probably not.) But Akroma is RFG’d and you have a nice 6/6 to hold the ground.

Another staple in the Big Dumb Artifact Deck.

Echoing Decay
Flexibility: 8
Price: 8
Overall: 8

For a quarter apiece, you have one of the most powerful pieces of token removal in the game, destroying Saprolings by the dozen. In addition, it’s pretty nice at ganking Elves, which often rely on multiples of, say, Wellwisher on the field. Echoing Decay only destroys tiny guys, sadly, but its flexibility in getting inadvertent three-for-ones becomes incredibly useful.

Echoing Decays are also really nice if you have a multiplayer group that loves building new decks with the most recently-released set; if you know they’re all going to trot out their freshly-purchased Noble Hierarchs, and you can make multiple people pay for their predictability.

Echoing Truth
Flexibility: 8
Price: 8
Overall: 8

…and for another quarter apiece, you can have the other most powerful pieces of token removal in the game. Echoing Truth is usually going to be a bog-standard Unsummon most of the time, but that’s handy enough, and the occasions you get to boing three Rancors back to someone’s hand in mid-combat become legendary. Flexible and sly, I likes me some Truth.

Enduring Ideal
Flexibility: 4
Price: 3
Overall: 6

Enduring Ideal is the prototype of a combo card; completely useless if you haven’t built a deck around it, totally smashworthy if you have.

There was, for a brief time, an Enduring Ideal deck in Extended that got some play, getting out an Ideal and then a Solitary Confinement followed by a Form of the Dragon or a Dovescape. This is equally effective in multiplayer, particularly if you do something really silly like throwing in a Paradox Haze.

The nice thing about the Enduring Ideal deck is that it’s flexible as all heck; yes, you have to get up to seven mana, but once you do you can search out an enchantment for every occasion, which makes it very dangerous, and even more so if you have a way to shuffle your graveyard back into your deck.

Eternal Witness
Flexibility: 9
Price: 2
Overall: 7

Ben referred to this as a super-uncommon in a recent article, which means that it’s an uncommon that trades like a rare. And no wonder! Eternal Witness is a card that allows a lot of dumb Green decks to keep up with their more card-efficient brothers, allowing you to get back that Tooth and Nail, return that gigantic dude that just got cacked, have an effective eight Banefires in your deck – and sometimes you can even chain Witnesses for that extra-special feeling of having more guys on the board. When your opponents are struggling to draw into their best cards, you’re snatching your goodies from the graveyard and getting a blocker to boot.

Eternal Witness is like salt, making every deck it’s in just a little bit better (as long as the mana can afford it). At sixteen bucks, this is one of the better investments you can make; you’ll always find a home, making this truly Eternal.

Farsight Mask
Flexibility: 4
Price: 8
Overall: 6

I have Farsight Mask as one of the top-end mana cards in my Mono-Red deck, which has a surprisingly good win record. And Farsight Mask is one of those cards where people shrug and go, “Okay, fine, have it” and then realize after the smoke has cleared that whoah, three people attacking me through the Mask seemed like a good idea, but in reality it just allowed me to draw into megaburn and zap them out.

Nobody likes getting hit, of course, and you do have to get bloodied to draw your card. Sometimes you do not survive the impact. But in the right deck as a one-of or a two-of, a deck with plenty of potent cards, the Farsight Mask can draw you out of the hole you’re in.

I don’t even want to think what happens when some punk combines this with lifegain.

Final Judgment
Flexibility: 4
Price: 4
Overall: 4

At six mana and a sorcery, this is not necessarily the Wrath of God you’re looking for. In fact, in less developed multiplayer groups, this may actually be a drawback, since in those situations it’s pricier and does less.

That said, Final Judgment is the quasher to all sorts of creature-based recursion engines, shutting down anyone who’s trying to get double-duty out of their guys returning them from the graveyard (with, say, Eternal Witness). Good groups tend to treat the graveyard as a refrigerator, fetching their guys back as casually as you’d get a Diet Pepsi, and this handles that nicely. So it’s a bullet for special occasions, but a nice bullet.

Fumiko the Lowblood
Flexibility: 2
Price: 6
Overall: 3

Do you care that Fumiko has Bushido? Heck no. You barely care that she attacks. The important thing about Fumiko is that if you have a stall-friendly multiplayer group, she is a decent tool to speed things up, forcing everyone to attack whether they want to or not.

Now, she’s small, so she’s easily cacked, and chances are good those annoying gits who like stalls will be attacking you, thanks to their grasp of “strategy” and all that. But if you can find a way around that, perhaps thanks to a Propaganda or even a Moat effect, then you’re probably safe. Even better, you’ll have sped up a glacial game for a turn or two, and isn’t that worth it?

Genju of the Fields
Flexibility: 6
Price: 7
Overall: 7

Arguably the best of the Genju cycle, the Fields are great because if you’ve got nothing better to do with your mana, you can get a lot of life.

Here’s how it works: You spend two mana and make Genju of the Fields a reasonably-butt-tastic 2/5 blocker with lifelink. Then you spend another two mana, and thanks to some poor templating, it remains a 2/5… But it gets another instance of lifelink. That means every time it deals damage, you get the life twice.

This scales well. I’ve activated my Genju five times, getting me ten life a turn, which was enough to keep me alive long enough for the win. I would have much preferred to be playing spells, of course, but sometimes you just don’t have that option. And gaining life isn’t a bad consolation prize.

Also, the Genju dodges Wrath effects, making it very sneaky in the right circumstances. I wouldn’t put four of this in a deck, because that’s a lot of slots for something that’s going to cost you a land if someone whips out the Terror, but two in the right deck can get you out of some bad situations.

Goblin Charbelcher
Flexibility: 2
Price: 3
Overall: 4

Another dumb combo card, this one’s a reasonably strong one, and Gabriel Nassif idea still holds up well today: cast this, cast Mana Severance to get rid of all the lands in your deck, activate the Belch, BOOM.

Narrow? Sure. Fun? Arguably. Effective? If they don’t have artifact destruction or a way to kill you before you can shotgun everyone at the table to death, sure.

The good news is that without land, you can stack your deck any way you want to set up the next draw, since your entire deck will be on the bottom — and given you’ll need to burp two or three opponents out of the way before you can call the game a win, this is a Good Thing.

Heartless Hidetsugu
Flexibility: 6
Price: 6
Overall: 6

Dude. This guy takes a turn to go active, but when he does, he starts doing very mean things to your opponents’ life totals. You want a quicker game? Be heartless.

Signing off,
The Ferrett
TheFerrett@StarCityGames.com
The Here Edits This Site Here Guy