The Kitchen Table #338 - Retiring the Most Underused Cards of All Time: Volume VI

Hello my friends, and welcome to today’s article, yet another entry in a long list of Underused articles going back 6 or 7 years or so. Yet, my most recent entry was #300, so it’s not been too long.

This is a series of articles dedicated to the Gorilla Chieftains of Magic. Outside of Limited, where do they get played? The once in a blue moon Ape deck, and that’s it. It’s the same with Rootwater Alligator. When do you see Living Airship soaring overhead? Cards like Village Elder and Soot Imp are the many cards between Awesome and Great on one side, and Suck and Awful on the other. They are missing the right creature type, the right ability, or the right power and toughness. Every year, as more sets are published, more cards are shunted aside into this yawning gap.

Despite the fact that many of us would likely not play many of these cards, there are a few cards that have been relegated to this area but do not deserve it. There are cards with a significant presence in the discount and bulk boxes, and yet they offer a lot of power to the casual player. That is one of the things this article series is dedicated to. It finds these underused cards, and brings them into the light and talks about them at length. It then inducts them in an Underused Hall of Fame, which you can see later.

In my previous article, I inducted 5 cards from each of six categories — Green, White, Black, Red, Blue and Other. For a while, there were tons of great subjects in each category, but as we continue, it is obvious that I still have great entries for some categories — like Green and Blue and Other, but fewer for some others. Thus, I am removing the restriction that I have to induct a certain number of cards in total, or a certain number of each color. It would also take me 8-10 hours to write one of those mega-epics, and that’s just not feasible.

I swept through sets from Lorwyn-Shadowmoor blocks back to Mirrodin and I found 18 new entries for later articles. Since this one is only going to count down 10, that means I have plenty of ammo for future articles.

At the end of the article you’ll find all of the previous cards, alphabetically by category. So I have added 10 cards in today’s article, and they are in order from 10 to 1, and will display the next ten next most important Underused cards out there. Alright, here we go, Alons-Y!

10. Soothsaying, Uncommon, Mercadian Masques — This is the little uncommon from old days of yore that could. It made a modest impact in decks of the time, and then has languished in obscurity. Prior to Sensei’s Divining Top, it was probably the best non-Sylvan Library way to know the top of your library. Note that Soothsaying can go deeper than three cards for some extra mana, and it can shuffle your library for a new set, when you need it. That makes it one of the few cards, unlike Mirri’s Guile or Sensei’s Divining Top, that can get you new cards by itself. Sure, it’s mana hungry, so you use it to sink extra mana into at the end of a turn. Because it’s so mana hungry, no one is killing your Soothsaying. It will sit there are give you card quality for a really long time. The only way it’s dying is if it gets caught in something like a Tranquility or is the only enchantment when someone plays Cloudchaser Eagle. This is a card that will do you proud.

9. Molder Slug, Rare, Mirrodin — Remember this amazing card for a few months, because it may rock even more when artifacts become the rage again in a few months. For now, it’s still really strong. A five mana investment gives you a very pertinent 4/6 creature for the red zone. There is no doubt that creatures of this size can win you games. I mean it’s not 8/8 trampler McGee, but for 5 mana, a 4/6 body can win. Let’s not forget that it’s also an artifact version of The Abyss. Everybody sacrifices an artifact every one of their turns, and that is card advantage very quickly. Even if all you get is a few artifact mana sources and a Solemn Simulacrum in the first pass around the table, you have future passes and a solid body. The card advantage it can give you is huge, and the board position it can grant you cannot be underestimated against players with artifacts. However, it is a harsh mistress and requires that you play without artifacts, and that means the Molder Slug is a great card for only some Green decks. If you aren’t playing artifacts in a Green deck, and your opponents are, pick up some of these and show them why this card is awesome.

8. Chromeshell Crab, Rare, Legions — I think that the morph mechanic has largely disappeared from multiplayer tables. Except for major hits like Willbender and Exalted Angel, you don’t see many of the great hits of morph much at tables today. I get that sexier things may have hit people’s card collections in the past few years, but cards like Bane of the Living, Mischievous Quanar, Hystrodon and of course, Chromeshell Crab are still very pertinent. The bad thing about morph is that the more you play, the better the mechanic is, so as you remove a morph here and there, your deck becomes more predictable. Cards like this one are undeniably good, but you have to decide if, in little-morph world, it is worth playing. I think so. As an instant, you can swap creatures (Yours is often the Crab). It’s great in response to stuff, like blocking, being targeted, and so forth. When Jane attacks you with Indrik Stomphowler because Dale has out an untapped Shivan Dragon, grab the dragon for your Crab, block the Stomphowler and now you have a 5/5 flying and firebreathing beater. The Crab has a ton of uses at the multiplayer board. Steal a combo piece, steal a beater, steal a great support creature for the situation — like a Prodigal Sorcerer against a deck with x/1s and so forth. You’ll find that swapping creatures at instant speed, often as a surprise, can really give you a much better position to abuse. Enjoy the Crab!

7. Wilderness Elemental, Uncommon, Coldsnap — When I wrote about Hibernation’s End and its entry in the previous edition of this series, I talked about how Coldsnap didn’t give you very many cards to take outside of its very insular mechanics. However, this creature is a deadly beater. You spend three mana for an x/3 trampler, where X can be super big. In today’s post-Zendikar world, the number of non-basics seeing play is at its zenith, and you can ride that by playing a three-drop that can be huge by your next turn. It gets bigger for every opposing non-basic, not just the ones under one player’s control. I’ve seen this get to player killer size. Even at a regular table with just three or four opponents, this could easily be a 6/3 or 7/3 by the fourth turn when it can attack. It will ruin anyone who thinks their small wall will handle a creature like this. It is the early beater that kills Steel Wall and Temple Acolyte and can even end Wall of Denial’s dominance. This is a powerful little package.

6. Arashi, the Sky Asunder, Rare, Saviors of Kamigawa — While I may not like Saviors at all, I have to admit that there are a handful of cards in there that I really do like. There aren’t many, but they are there. This one is easily powerful. For 5 mana, you get a 5/5, and just like Molder Slug above, it gives you a winning condition and removal. You can Blaze flying creatures whenever you want. Just tap and Blaze a flyer. Speaking of that, why don’t we have a Blaze for flyers in Green? [/digression] Arashi is a great card in play because it has size and a strong ability. Arashi’s usefulness goes way beyond that though. The channel ability to Hurricane at instant speed (except you don’t hit players, and for one more G) is just awesome. You can’t even counter it, barring something like Stifle, so you are almost guaranteed of it resolving. It can easily catch someone tapped out, and can have a great “Your Pants are Down” moment. Since it can be a great Spider OR a great Rattlesnake that can also serve for a quarter of a player’s starting life total, this is just a tremendously strong card.

5. Aeon Chronicler, Rare, Planar Chaos — There was a time when this card got played in a few tournament decks here and there. That time has passed us by, but the Chronicler is still strong. There are a lot of reasons to like this card, and one of the best is that the Suspend ability — while costing a lot of mana to start and used as a sorcery — makes for an uncounterable effect. You get to draw one more every turn for a lot of turns, and then you get a hasty creature in the area around 4/4-6/6. Card advantage matters, and putting 10 mana into a Chronicler for six turns to give you six extra cards, plus a creature at the end — well, that has a lot of strength to it. Don’t ignore how powerful effects like this and Arashi’s are as uncounterable abilities. Also, don’t ignore how valuable it is to have creatures like Arashi, Molder Slug and Aeon Chronicler to be your major contributors for their abilities. You can win with creatures that create card advantage while also providing large bodies to the attacking and blocking so essential to the game.

4. Stonewood Invocation, Rare, Time Spiral — You are never going to see another Giant Growth on one of my lists in Magic. This is a very powerful card, and yet sorely underplayed. I think some players just dismissed it because it’s just a Giant Growth, except it’s not. It has three major things going for it. First, just like any Giant Growth, it can severely increase the power and toughness of a creature which can kill in combat, or survive an Earthquake style card, or smack someone for an extra five damage. Second, it cannot be stopped by traditional methods, or even responded to, due to its split second. If you go to Giant Growth a creature with this, there is no targeting it in response. Finally, it gives the creature shroud, so it cannot be killed afterwards. It essentially counters targeted removal against your creatures. If you attack with two Air Elementals, and your opponent wants to Ray of Command one to steal and then block the other, say no, say it uncounterably, and hit your opponent for 5 more for being impertinent. Grab some of these and try them out, and I’m confident you’ll find them much better than you thought.

3. Sudden Spoiling, Rare, Time Spiral — While on a split second kick, let’s talk about the power of Sudden Spoiling. It can sail out of nowhere to Sorceress Queen one opponent’s whole team for a turn, and also nuke their abilities. Cards like Pyroclasm, Bloodfire Kavu and Infest love it. It will allow you to use removal cards like that to take out creatures with ornery things like shroud and indestructible. You can use this as a simple Fog if that’s all you can need, or you can ambush those big and protected creatures. It turns threats that Black can’t normally handle into a little bitty creature just one block or attack away from dying (like Akroma the Real). The ability to ambush someone’s whole squad, and for just three mana, is a great price and a great ability. Then add split second? You’ve got a card there that can seriously impact the game for the better for you.

2. Decimate, Rare, Odyssey — Sometimes the cards on this list are like #1 next, and were once a card that was touted as amazing, then Standard went elsewhere and people forgot about it, even for multiplayer. Stonehewer Giant and Scapeshift were previous entries that had this problem. Then there are multiplayer classics that have fallen by the wayside, and cards like Bane of the Living and this one are examples of this phenomenon. Decimate is a powerful tool for Red/Green decks. It will off one permanent of every type (except Planeswalker), but it has too. If your table lacks an enchantment or artifact, you cannot play this. If it only has one or the other or both only under your control, you probably don’t want to play this. However, these circumstances are very rare. Normally, it’s a four-for-one, destroying a powerful creature, a powerful enchantment, a powerful creature, and whatever land is out there. Sometimes it destroys a powerful creature, a powerful enchantment, a minor artifact, and a random land. Sometimes it can bring several players ahead of you back to the ground. Sometimes it can bring down a guy with a super powerful machine of death. I’ve never drawn it in multiplayer and said, “You suck, why are you in my deck?!?” It’s is a powerful removal spell for Red/Green and includes the ability to destroy a creature, which the colors rarely get. Enjoy this powerful spell again. Remember why you fell in love all of those years ago.

1. Rings of Brighthearth, Rare, Lorwyn — As I alluded to above, this is the Stonehewer Giant or Scapeshift of today’s class. Everybody thought this card might be really great, failed to find an immediate way to abuse it, and then gave up and moved on to other things. The Rings really have two powerful ways to give you an extra dose of power. The first is to find one or a few very powerful activated abilities and then fork them for 2 mana. This is basically the plan in any deck with very powerful activations, like Memory Jars or something. The Rings are an essential part of the deck. The other way to play them is just to add some to a deck that already has a large number of activated abilities. Let me just give you a few ideas. How about fetchlands to get a second land with paying life? How about a Planeswalker ability without changing or paying loyalty counters? Note that the Rings of Brighthearth never mentions activated abilities of permanents, so you can copy things like Cycling without much of a problem at all. For a fork cost of 2 mana and a play cost of 3, it fits into many decks, and unlike Mirari, you can have multiple ones in play at the same time in order to get multiple forks. Why aren’t you playing this amazing card?

Well, that brings us to the end of another entry in the Underused Hall of Fame. Remember that I include an alpha list of the full Hall in the Appendix, so you can peruse that at your leisure. I hope you enjoyed this week, and we’ll catch you next one!

Until later…

Abe Sargent

Appendix:

Black:

Attrition
Bane of the Living
Carrionette
Crypt Angel
Desolation Angel
Do or Die
Forsaken Wastes
Gate to Phyrexia
Ill-Gotten Gains
Infernal Tribute
Krovikan Horror
Massacre
Nezumi Graverobber
Night Dealings
No Mercy
Organ Grinder
Oubliette
Plague Sliver
Planar Void
Predatory Nightstalker/Wei Assassins
Sengir Autocrat
Tainted Pact
Tombstone Stairwell
Tortured Existence
Vile Requiem