Abe takes us through the personalities that appear in Portal Three Kingdoms, and highlights a host of fine casual all-stars for your next multiplayer melee. Having trouble distinguishing your Zhang Liao from your Zhang Jiao, or your Lu Bei from your Lu Bu? Abe can help!Okay, I admit it. I’m out of the obvious ideas. Everything that was on my plate: the set review, the deck article, the Nexus deck, and the Equinaut primer… they’re complete. Now I need to write another article, and my list of ideas has dried up without any new additions.
Sorta.
You see, in my recent deck article last week, I used a Three Kingdoms card. Then, early this week, I began reading Romance of the Three Kingdoms, and I’m about 150 pages in so far. Did you know that about fifteen of the Portal Three Kingdoms cards are in the first ten pages of this huge work? It’s true, including Peach Garden Oath.
In fact, if you have ever thought about reading R3K, I wholeheartedly recommend it. Considering when it was written, it reads a lot easier than old English writings of the same time period, like Chaucer. These stories are among the bedrock legends of China, sort of like our King Arthur or our Iliad and Odyssey. The only difficult part is the Chinese nature of the names. You eventually get used to it, but in the beginning, you can get overwhelmed by all of the people and places. One bit of fun I get is listing all of the Zhangs (Zhang Fei, Zhang Liao, Zhang Ce, Zhang Mao, Zhang Jiao, Zhang Liang, Zhang Bao, Zhang He, etc). This began because three brothers named Zhang led the Yellow Scarves Rebellion, which is in the beginning of the story. (In China, our last name, or surname, comes first and our given name comes second). However, most of the major characters in the storyline are different enough that you can get through (Sun Jian, Liu Bei, Cao Cao, Lu Xu, Yang Shao, Dong Zhou, Zhang Fei, Guan Yu, Wang Yun, Zhao Zilong, and Diaochan).
In today’s article, I’ll be giving a few spoilers from the storyline as I review cards. It’s like spoiling Arthur’s Roundtable by telling you about Lancelot’s early career. I’m only one hundred and fifty pages in, of about two thousand. What I know is more preamble than anything else.
I’ve been in a bit of a Portal mood recently. I was checking out a few cards and their prices. Now, talking about Portal is nothing new. I have dedicated four articles in the past to Portal, plus the occasional daily deck or part of a larger article. Still, these are sets full of great cards, and they aren’t mined as much as they should be by casual deck builders.
Today I want to discuss cards that are relatively affordable in the Portal universe that you may have missed. Sure, there are really expensive cards like Rolling Earthquake and Imperial Seal. There are also tons of cheaper cards that are still really saucy, and for a much more reduced price.
Let’s put these cards in several categories to allow you to see the connections in your mind:
The Good Horsemanship Creatures
In my first Portal articles, before it was made legal, I discussed several rulings that you could make at your kitchen table so as to allow horsemanship creatures. The best ruling, and the one we adopted, was to allow horsemanship creature to be able to be blocked by flyers, but not to be able to block flyers themselves. This fit perfectly in with flavor and the power of the card. A flying drake should be able to intercept the horseman, but the horseman should not be able to block the flying drake.
However, when Wizards decided to let Portal in, they let it in with horsemanship as written. That leaves us with a large number of creatures in Portal: Three Kingdoms that can only be blocked by creatures with horsemanship.
The designers should get good credit for horsemanship. In the stories, the generals and leaders and always meeting on the battlefield on horseback and fighting while their soldiers either observe or are fighting around them. It’s uncommon to see battles fought without seeing the leaders clash in the middle. The untouchability of these leaders by the masses, and their ability to always seek each other out and fight a private battle, is summed up perfectly by the ability and what it does. This was good design.
Are there many creatures with horsemanship at your table? Probably not. That makes these creatures virtually unblockable. You like unblockable creatures, right? Especially if they are costed in a manner similar to flying. Let’s take a look at the better ones.
Cao Ren, Wei Commander — He’s a 3/3 horsemanship creature for four mana who also hits a player for three life when he comes into play. Who is that player? It’s you. After that, you get a 3/3 unblockable in a color with Dark Ritual. This is golden in more suicide-oriented builds that occasionally hit up against solid defense on casual night.
Guan Yu, Sainted Warrior — A White unblockable for five mana with a 3/5 body? This guy can mug up the ground and then get in the occasional hit when your defense is shored up. He’s a solid creature, although his extra ability is nothing special. If it went on top of your library, then it might be one thing, but just getting shuffled back is minor, and often an inconvenience in the color of Resurrection. In the story, Guan Yu fought with a crescent blade called Green Dragon, so if you use the spell, Wielding the Green Dragon on him, it would be very appropriate.
Lady Zhurong, Warrior Queen – Having a nice four power unblockable creature for five mana in Green is a really nice treat. Lady Zhurong is pretty good in game, and your Green decks that plug up the ground with all of their elves and tramplers should find some value in her.
Liu Bei, Lord of Shu — The card is okay, with a 2/4 unblockable getting much better if one of his Oathbrothers is in play (Zhang Fei and Guan Yu). He’s a bit underwhelming for arguably the main character of the story. He’s still a nice unblockable for your deck, and if you have the two Oathbrothers, he becomes pretty good. So far, he’s the Deus ex Machina of the tale, often showing up at the last moment to help an opponent of Dong Zhou’s as they were about to lose, pitching in and helping out. Later, he’ll fight against Yuan Shao as well.
Lu Bu, Master at Arms — Although he costs six mana and he’s just a 4/3, he has haste and horsemanship, which makes for a nice combination. Compare him to the six mana – but two of it Red – Volcanic Dragon at 4/4 with haste and flying. Lu Bu is easier to cast, requiring just one Red. If you want a Red deck to have a little extra kick at the end, look for Lu Bu.
In other news, I am very disappointed with Lu Bu. In the books, he is one of the greatest warriors of his time, and single-handedly slew numerous people and changed the tide in Dong Zhou’s behalf. He fought Zhang Fei, who is a 4/4 with horsemanship, and was winning when Guan Yu jumped in. Lu Bu single handedly held off both Guan Yu and Zhang Fei at the same time, and Liu Bei had to jump into the fray and it took all three Oathbrothers to defeat Lu Bu and force him to flee the field of battle. However, Zhang Fei, a 4/4, is stronger than Lu Bu’s 4/3, and when you add Guan Yu and Liu Bei to the battle, you see that Lu Bu is a very powered-down version of the character from the story line. (One quote goes, “Among heroes, Lu Bu, among horses, Red Hare”). To be fair, Lu Bu was Riding Red Hare, which would give him +3/+3, but Guan Yu was Wielding the Green Dragon, which would give him +4/+4. That means Guan Yu alone would have been 6/8 to Lu Bu’s 7/6, making Guan Yu the obvious winner when that was not the case. Simply put, Lu Bu should arguably be among the most powerful horsemanship people, if not the best, and instead, he is merely in the same vicinity as others. For another story that involves Lu Bu, see Diaochan later.
Lu Meng, Wu General — He’s just an Air Elemental with horsemanship instead of flying. That makes him a pretty easy card to assess. I like him, but your mileage may vary.
Lu Xun, Scholar General — I really like Lu Xun’s combination of Thieving Magpie ability with a complete unblockability (barring horsemanship, which admittedly, is rather unlikely). He was one of the first Portal: 3K cards that I picked up for my casual games. His horsemanship is never that big of a threat, and I’m very fond of him because he doesn’t get axed that often, but he gets you cards in addition to nipping in every now and then for a point of damage.
Ma Chao, Western Warrior — I do not like him that much. His extra ability to be unblocked if he is the only attacker is meaningless with horsemanship, so he’s a 3/3 for five, two of it Red. Now, compare that to, say, Lu Bu who has haste and one more power for one more mana, or Lady Zhurong who is a 4/3 for five mana and an easier casting cost, or Lu Meng who is a 4/4 so the same mana cost in Blue. He just doesn’t stand up to the others.
Shu Calvary — As a 2/2 horsemanship creature for three mana, this creature is slightly easier to cast than a Phantom Warrior or some such. However, I’d rather play other creatures such as Phantom Warrior, Azorius Herald, or Soltari Trooper.
Shu General — The only thing I find interesting in the Shu General is its ability to swing and hit for two guaranteed while also staying back and able to block. Vigilance on an unblockable creature is tasty.
Sun Ce, Young Conqueror — To be fair, Sun Ce has a higher price tag than many of the other cards we are investigating here. A five mana Man-o’-War with a 3/3 unblockable body is pretty tasty. If he didn’t cost so much money, I’d advocate you getting one for sure, because he does two things well. Since he does, I’ll allow your own pocketbooks to be the guide, but he is brilliant. Sun Ce is Sun Quan’s older brother, and he is the eldest son of Sun Jian and takes over after Sun Jian presses too hard in a campaign and is caught in a trap with just thirty horseman and killed.
Sun Quan, Lord of Wu — The single best creature in all Portal sets, and one of the most powerful creatures of all time. This 4/4 six mana horsemanship creature gives it to all of your team! Imagine they printed the following card in Future Sight: Super Cool Legend, 4UU, Legend, 4/4, Your creatures cannot be blocked. That’d be amazing for any casual game! Don’t worry, because it is already in print and, although a decent price tag accompanies it, it is up there with Avatar of Woe, Akroma (both), and Darksteel Colossus for sheer power at the table.
Wei Night Riders — Would you like an Abyssal Specter with a 2/2 body instead of a 2/3 but unblockable? Sure, we all would. Getting a guaranteed hit in every turn and forcing a discard is gravy in a boat. Look no further than these guys.
Yuan Shao, the Indecisive — Again, an awkward Goblin War Drums ability tacked onto a horsemanship creature is a bit odd, but since it affects all of your creatures, you can get that ability plus the unblockable 2/3 splashable-but-five-mana Yuan Shao. Like many characters in the story, Yuan Shao is shown and loyal and noble at first, but as he gains power, becomes more corrupt. In fact, Yuan Shao, despite leading a rebellion created by Cao Cao against Dong Zhou ultimately becomes just as tyrannical as Dong Zhou himself. A local independent ruler helped out Yuan Shao and his army by donating food to the cause, and Yuan Shao responded by creating a plot to take over that province through guile and might of arms because it was relatively undefended, despite that ruler’s help.
Zhang Fei, Fierce Warrior — As I mentioned before, vigilance combines well with unblockability, especially at the multiplayer table. That’s especially true for a larger 4/4 body like that of Zhang Fei. He’s very nice. So far, Zhang Fei is a bit of a reckless fighter, often plunging headlong into battle and regularly having to be restrained by the Oathbrothers. He seems more Red than White to me.
Zhang He, Wei General — I have always like Soltari Champion because its pump ability combined with shadow allows it to get a hit in, and you get the bonus to other creatures whenever needed without fear of losing your attacker — unless an opponent has shadow, which is a bit of a fear these days. Zhang He has a lesser concern, since horsemanship is highly unlikely to be had, combined with a much larger power. Four unblockable power, plus he pumps all of your creatures in the front by one when he attacks. That’s a pretty solid creature.
Zhao Zilong, Tiger General — Zhao is a rare thing among the horsemanship creatures. He’s actually good on defense (see also, Guan Yu). He is a 4/4 on defense (3/3 on the attack) with horsemanship, which allows you to mug up the ground with him until you have defense, and then he swings in for three a turn. That’s a solid contribution. In the books, he joins the three Oathbrothers when they are fighting for one of the local nobles against Yuan Shao thinking that noble would be their way of breaking Yuan Shao and his grip on several provinces. However, Dong Zhou orders a ceasefire, and when the noble they follow chooses to throw in with Yuan Shao and Dong Zhou and leave the battlefield, they lose faith, and Liu Bei promises Zhao Zilong that they will serve together later.
Other Portal Three Kingdoms Cards You Should Have
Leaving behind the horsemanship creatures, there are a few other cards from the set that you should have with a smaller price tag than the two heavy hitters from the set, Imperial Seal and Zodiac Dragon. There are eight cards listed here in all. Another card, Strategic Planning, did not meet my criteria for being relatively cheap (fifteen dollars or less), but it’s really good as well in this world of Divining Tops and Sylvan Libraries and Scroll Racks.
Cao, Cao, Lord of Wei — Mr. Cao Cao himself, a rather ruthless man but with a twisted sense of honor, is a decent enough 3/3 for five mana. When you add in the ability to tap to force a player to discard two cards, he becomes pretty good. You can only use this ability during your first main phase, prior to the attack, but still, the ability of any creature to tap and Mind Rot someone is pretty good. In a duel, your opponent would quickly run out of ammo for good Mr. Cao to use, but in multiplayer, Cao Cao will keep causing discards until no one has cards, you die, or he dies — and either of those options could take a very long time.
So far, Cao Cao is good and bad. One story I like is how he was running from Dong Zhou and his enforcers, and has a significant bounty on his head, so he is heading home to begin a resistance. He stops at a house of a friend of his fathers, and that friend goes to market to buy supplies to honor Cao Cao. While he is still out, Cao Cao overhears the family gathered in the warehouse, with a sharpening stone being used, and one says something like, “First we’ll tie him up, then we’ll kill him.” Cao Cao realizes that he needs to strike first before they take him out, so he charges into the barn / warehouse and kills the entire family, including the women — around eight of them in all. Then, in the aftermath, he sees a pig tied in the corner. He realizes that the family was just referring to the pig, not him. He escapes off into the night but comes across the family friend on the road, coming back from the market. Cao Cao’s companion tries to mumble out an excuse, but Cao Cao charges the family friend and kills him right there. When his companion cries in protest, Cao Cao points out that the man would have launched a campaign against Cao Cao, and right now they need to focus on taking out Dong Zhou. (Cao Cao famously will reply, “I’d rather wrong the world before the world wrongs me.”) It shows his Black side, although he is regularly confronting antagonists in the story so far (against Dong Zhou and later Yuan Shao, for example, and he rewards the Oathbrothers, especially Guan Yu, when they win a battle against Dong Zhou’s forces.) He is often portrayed as one of the few who will speak out against tyranny and take action, trying to kill Dong Zhou personally, and failing, for example.
Diaochan, Artful Beauty — This is a great card in multiplayer. Find a temporary ally, and then hit Mr. Big Creature under the control of a mutual enemy. Then your temporary ally takes out the remaining Mr. Big Creature, and in one easy, manaless tapping motion, you have destroyed two of the biggest threats at the table. Plus, you never have to worry about her getting out of hand, because the second you use her too much, your opponent will take her out with the second kill.
She is my favorite card in the set because her ability matches her storyline exactly. Wang Yun hosts Lu Xu, Dong Zhou’s right hand man, and gets Lu Xu to fall for his adopted daughter, Diaochan. He promises her to him as a concubine, and Lu Xu is amazingly pleased. Then, a few days later, Wang Yu hosts Dong Zhou, and gives Diaochan to Dong Zhou right there. Dong Zhou is pleased and Lu Xu is upset. Diaochan plays them off each other for a while, and ultimately Lu Xu gets so upset that he joins Wang Yun’s side, and ambushes and kills Dong Zhou. So, in the story, Diaochan gets two major antagonists to fight for her, and in the game, she can off two people, but your opponent can choose one. That’s very slick design.
Dong Zhou, the Tyrant — The early antagonist of the epic, Dong Zhou is a great card. I have won numerous games with a Dong Zhou, and have often related them here. I’ve even built a Dong Zhou deck once in this column. He’s definitely good enough for you to get some use out of. Unlike other characters, I cannot remember a time when he was not portrayed as a villain. At least Yang Shao began his tenure with a promise to reward merit, unlike Dong Zhou. (However, Yuan Shao would not keep that pledge, although Cao Cao would keep it for him behind his back, at least with the Oathbrothers). Dong Zhou is so fat that when he dies, the city guard light a fire in his belly button.
Hua Tuo, Honored Physician — His ability to tap and place a creature card form your graveyard to the top of your library certainly isn’t new, as per Volrath’s Stronghold. It’s also not as good as some older cards, like Adun Oakenshield. It can also only be used on the first main phase. However, with all of those restrictions, a simple tap effect that uses no mana to recur critters is pretty good. There’s a lot of subtle power in Hua Tuo.
Hunting Cheetah — This is a great creature. For three mana you get a 2/3 creature that gets you a Forest when it hits. It has more power than an Avenging Druid and gets you a dual land to boot! The Cheetah is good enough to find a home in some decks out there.
Kongming, Sleeping Dragon — Do you like Glorious Anthem but you always wished that it would be a creature? Look no further, because your 2/2 Glorious Anthem has arrived. It’s not bad, although its creature status makes it more fragile and its legendary status makes it playable only in ones. On the other hand, you’ll never need to topdeck a creature and curse at the Anthem you just drew.
Meng Huo, Barbarian King — He’s a Kaysa that actually can stand up in a fight as a 4/4 for five mana. The ability to pump Green creatures is solid, as are his stats. He’s a very respectable creature.
Riding the Dilu Horse — This card gets my vote as the funkiest card in all of Magic. It’s a sorcery that pumps a creature +2/+2 and gives it horsemanship. Pretty tame right? Except the effect does not end at the end of the turn. It permanently gives that creature +2/+2 and horsemanship (which is essentially unblockability, remember). There’s nothing to remember the effect — no counters, no enchantments, no permanents of any kind, nothing. You just have to remember that it’s +2/+2 and horsemanship. I’ve previously built a deck around this card, because I had to. You simply have to own this crazy card, and play it on your opponents.
Next Up, Portal the First
From the last to the first, let’s keep moving around the Portal block. A quick warning however — Portal the first is very poor in card quality that lasts. Just letting you know now that we won’t be seeing a large number of Portal cards here or anything.
Cruel Tutor — Does your combo-licous deck need more tutors and you are willing to pay the double digit price? Are you running a large highlander deck and you need at another tutor, and have no other options? Are you ready to play a cheaper tutor, even at sorcery speed, than other options like Demonic Collusion? Then you want Cruel Tutor (Abe’s Deck of Happiness and Joy has one!)
Deep Wood — Many Fog effects prevent all combat damage, but not Deep Wood. Deep Wood allows the defenders to slap the attackers silly while the attackers deal no damage. It’s a nice surprise for someone who thinks to overwhelm you with numbers even though you have a number of blockers available.
Devastation — Why would you want a Jokulhaups that costs one more mana and destroys less permanents? It is the ultimate Wildfire. Wildfire decks often try to get opponents to a point where a Wildfire kills their creatures and / or Armageddons them. Now you have a spell that does both, and leaves your mana artifacts untouched, so you can keep going. There’s an easy deck to build around Devastation.
Final Strike — Yes, it’s a sorcery speed Fling that costs double the price, but, on the other hand, it’s a Black Fling in the same color as cards like Cabal Coffers (well, sorta) and Maga, Traitor to Mortals. I’m sure you can find a use or three even for a sorcery and expensive Fling.
Jungle Lion — Everybody knows what Jungle Lion is and what he does. He is the banner card of good Portal cards that now have a chance to shine at tournament and kitchen tables alike. I am including him here for completeness.
Personal Tutor — See comment above on Cruel Tutor but note that this guy, although cheaper and without the life loss, is not only less money to purchase but more limited in scope — netting you a sorcery.
Virtue’s Ruin — If your casual table is seeing one too many White creatures, then Virtue’s Ruin is what is called for. I know that at our table, there always seems to be a mono-White deck of some sort or another. Virtue’s Ruin can handle that problem with ease, while leaving your hopefully non-White deck with a full set of creatures.
And that’s it. Like I said, the original Portal set doesn’t feature too much that is new and exciting. It has a Fling, a Fog, a Savannah Lion, two tutors, a Perish and a Jokulhaups. Next up, Portal II: Second Age.
A New Age
With Portal II we get new cards and new ideas, plus a lot of old retreads. Let’s see!
Ancient Craving — This card is an exact version of Ambition’s Cost. I have one of each in Abe’s Deck of Happiness and Joy, and other highlander players value duplication. As a splashable way of drawing a few cards, it’s solid.
Brimstone Dragon — This is a nice, beefy dragon with haste. It’s no Akroma, and there have been several recent dragons that are flat out better (like a certain Pit Fighter Dragon), but if you are looking for flavor in your dragons of doom, then take a gander at this older fellow.
Denizen of the Deep — I doubt that I am the only person who remembers the good old days when big Blue creatures of the ocean typically sucked with only a handful being any good at all (take a look at Island Fish Jasconius or Elder Spawn if you have questions.). However, Benthic Behemoth changed that, having not some wacky disadvantage about islands and death, but instead featuring Islandwalk. Another creature like this is Denizen of the Deep, who’s disadvantage to bounce all of your creatures can easily been seen as an advantage in many decks and situations. Play this bad boy in homage to all of the crappy Blue creatures that came before!
Ogre Arsonist — The great thing about Ogre Arsonist is that for one more mana than Avalanche Riders you get a 3/3 that pops a land when it comes into play, without any haste and without any echo. It really contributes to your creature base, unlike the Riders that often is left to die. It’s also big enough to survive some really clever removal cards, if you were to play them — like Pyroclasm or Aether Flash.
Piracy — Piracy is like a giant Mana Short as a sorcery, but for all players at the table other than yourself. When you play Piracy, typically what happens is that people, fearing your Piracy, will start tapping out — often willing to take mana burn in order to avoid giving you mana. Then you’ll always have a few who will allow you access to their mana. Playing a Piracy often gives you some mana and forces people to play instants from their hands and causes some mana burn. It’s very disruptive. You can’t always rely on it being an uber Dark Ritual, but it does a lot of work for just two mana. If you play multiplayer, you owe it to yourself to pick up some of these and try them out. You’ll be pleased that you did! I occasionally drop Piracy into my decks.
Predatory Nightstalker — I really like this card. It’s a 3/2 creature for five mana that is also an Edict on your opponent, forcing that person to sac a creature of their choice. As a Edict on a stick, the Nightstalker is not bad, and for one mana more than Nekrataal, you get a creature with +1/+1, no first strike, and the ability to kill Black creatures, Akroma, and indestructible creatures if they are alone. After all, Edict is sometimes better than a Terror, and sometimes worse.
Steam Catapult — Take a closer look at this card. Your soldier decks need this soldier. It can tap to destroy a tapped creature. Now sure, it only works on your turn, in the first main phase, but isn’t it worth it to a have a creature on theme that can tap to destroy an opposing creature in White? I certainly think so.
Sylvan Basilisk — The best Basilisk ever printed. It kills blockers instantly, before damage is dealt. You simply cannot block and kill the Basilisk with any effect this side of indestructible. This is simply great with Lures. I’ve built a deck around this beauty before.
Temple Acolyte — This card must get reprinted in a set soon. It is simply too good not to be known. In multiplayer and duels alike, the T.Aco is a great critter, and you’ll find that you love it. It has an impact in formats as diverse as multiplayer and Peasant Magic. If it gets reprinted, you’ll quickly learn just how good it is. It’s in our essential 250 deck (a highlander deck constructed with Five Color rules at exactly 250 cards). We think it’s every bit as good as Wall of Blossoms and Akroma and Spike Weaver and Flametongue Kavu when cutting to 250 cards. That’s how good it is.
Temporal Manipulation — Whether you want a few more Time Warps for your Crazy Combo Man deck or if you just need a spare for your highlander deck, Temporal Manipulation is a solid choice.
…
And with that, we have finished yet another article here on The Kitchen Table. I hope you enjoyed yourself! Even more, I hope you found a card or three that tweak your thoughts and make you want to build around them. I wish you luck in all of your Portal endeavors!
Until later,