Taking A Swipe At Eldritch Moon: Part 3

Brad Nelson and Todd Anderson are looking for a few good Eldritch Moon cards! Fortunately, a few have popped up on their Tinder app. Would you swipe left, swipe right, or super like these Eldritch Moon potentials?

Brad Swipes Left: Not interested. Liliana is bad enough with her selfishness and backstabbing, so I’m not that confident in her vows. Especially when they come with so much sass! Edict effects are at an all-time low in efficiency with so many tokens and Eldrazi Scions roaming around, and the token this card provides only happens when a much more powerful card enters the battlefield. We don’t need to make Gideon, Ally of Zendikar great again. He has been and always will be good on his own.

Todd Swipes Left: At another time in my life, Oath of Liliana would have been just the thing I was looking for. But I’m older and wiser. The metagame has shifted throughout my life, and this is not the time for such a mediocre effect. Everyone knows that Oaths are only as good as the first ability, and you don’t really need extra icing on top of that cake. I’m trying to watch my figure, after all. Once you start bringing other planeswalkers to the party, it’ll be clear that you should leave Oath of Liliana at the door.

Brad Swipes Left:

Now this card has a fiery intensity to itself, but I don’t think we would be compatible. I’m not really interested in hellbent aggression towards those who have wronged me. Things in my life have taken me down that path, but I’ve learned that after bad things you can either become bitter or better. I’ve since chosen to become better.

I feel sad for Bloodhall Priest. In a different time or place this card might find a match, but right now there are just too many other things to be doing which makes me believe this card will never find a home. At least not a good and healthy one.

Todd Swipes Right:

I don’t care what anyone else says, Bloodhall Priest is my type of card. If you’re working on a Vampire/Madness strategy, this really seems like a nice fit. The stats here are comparable to Arrogant Wurm on the surface (minus trample), while also having the added benefit of dealing a ton of damage if you’re able to empty your hand. And aggressive decks do love to empty their hand.

The problem I see with the card, right now, is that the rest of the Vampire deck might not be good enough. We all thought Vampires would become a real contender when Shadows over Innistrad was first released, and we were all severely disappointed. Let’s just hope that Bloodhall Priest is the one to get us interested again.

Brad Swipes Left:

This card seems too committed to its work. It’s nice to be with someone who’s full of passion, but I just can’t get behind something that experiments on helpless beings. That and the fact that its creations don’t even seem to be worth the cost. Five mana is a lot to pay for a card that needs additional things to happen to be good. Especially with only four toughness, making this card not win a fight against Archangel Avacyn, and no enters-the-battlefield ability to fend off Reflector Mages.

Todd Swipes Left:

With so many fish in the sea, why would I choose a fly? I’m also not in the business of being second fiddle to your job, so you gotta put me first or it isn’t going to work. I get that you’ve got this whole Jeff Goldblum thing going on, and it’s kinda hot, but you’re too much of an investment to be worth the cost. Plus, I don’t want to wake up one night to see you experimenting on me. I ain’t about that life.

Brad Swipes Left:

This card seems is nice and all, but I’m getting the vibe that its love for life is really too intense. Don’t get me wrong, life is great and all, but I don’t want to hear how I’m wasting it all the time! No, I don’t want to get up at six in the morning to go on a nature walk. That’s not my cup of tea. I want to wake up to coffee and my iPhone and not hear how I’m poisoning my body with caffeine and my brain with Facebook.

Maybe if this card weren’t so repetitive, it would be playable. Starting the game at 26 life is awesome, and I love the Leyline mechanic, but repeating the same ability upon resolution is boring and not even that good. Seven is a lot of mana to pay for life in a format all about gaining incremental advantages over the duration of the game. Dealing 26 damage isn’t that difficult when you could be drawing multiple cards a turn and presenting more than one threat.

Todd Swipes Left:

You’ve got heart, and it shows, but you’re lacking in the one place it counts most: maturity. Some people never want to grow up, but it’s definitely another thing to be 26 forever. In every relationship, the beginning is the most fun, but the least important. Providence is definitely one to keep an eye out for if you’re into that, but I’m too old and too tired to keep trying to live my life like I’m 26 forever.

Brad Swipes Right:

Now this is a card that seems to have it all figured out: strong and confident while also raising three youngsters all by herself. I have heard rumors, though, that her previous spouse’s death might not have been as accidental as the reports made it out to be. That said, everyone is entitled to their side of every story and I hope I get a chance to hear it.

I have high hopes for this card, but fear those won’t be met until we embark to Kaldadesh. I’ve yet to be shown that a synergy-based deck can compete with those of brute force, which is why I am skeptical. Delirium is a strong mechanic but overshadowed by the sheer power of the cards in this format. I don’t want to waste precious time setting up a card like this when my opponent can simply fight it with Dromoka’s Command and Archangel Avacyn. At that point, the tokens Ishkanah, Grafwidow produced will be a sheer annoyance unless they are protecting a planeswalker. Even then, Avacyn might get mad and burn them all away. I love the card; I just think it will need time.

Todd Swipes Right:

I don’t know about you, but I have a thing for high toughness and child-rearing potential. While those children might be Spiders, you gotta take what you can get when you’re as desperate as I am for large, green monsters. Just don’t take her home to Dad. She might eat him (and you, for that matter).

Brad Swipes Right:

The golden rule of dating is “never date someone who doesn’t have friends,” and Dark Salvation has those in spades! Not only that, but they protect each other, which is hard to find these days. My only concern is if Dark Salvation will be willing to take a few nights off from her old gangly gang to meet mine.

I do think this card will come in handy when paired with some of the other powerful Zombie cards in the format. I don’t have high hopes that a Zombie deck will break out as one of the best decks in the format, but scalable cards like this are exactly what this deck was missing. It’s good in the early-game and can win the game all by itself in the late-game.

Todd Swipes Right:

I like a good party, and Dark Salvation is always willing to invite her friends. Sure, those friends might be Zombies that bring along some horrible plague, but at least they’re good dancers. While Dark Salvation might take some time to get things started, you’d better believe she is worth the investment. Just know that she needs commitment before she really starts to open up.

Brad Swipes Right:

I hate it when my significant other ends an argument prematurely, just to dredge it up at a later date, but I can deal with that when everything else about this card is spectacular. This card already has a home in Bant Company as well as potentially finding another in a new U/W Spirits deck that might be good. That’s because it is amazing! Tempo-based counterspells have always been good, and even though this could cause a significant tempo loss later on in the game, we will be prepared for it. I expect this card to be in the winning decklist at the Pro Tour and will be playing it unless Team EUreka finds a way to loosen my grip on this card which is my favorite card in the set.

Todd Super Likes:

I’m not one to rate cards on a scale. It’s demeaning, and offensive. But if you’re going to pull my arm about it…

Perfect 10.

She’s right. You’re wrong. End of story. Yeah, maybe you bring up the same argument at a later time, and she lets you win that one. But that’s why she’s so perfect.

Brad Swipes Right:

Now this is the type of card I can take home to meet my madre! It’s quick on its feet when it comes to protecting those it cares about. I can’t think of anything more noble than going to bat for those you love, and that’s exactly what I see this card doing. Being able to come down aggressively on turn 4 during combat makes it very difficult for anyone to block against Bant Humans.

Sometimes you just have to hope the Collected Company doesn’t hit Thalia’s Lieutenant during blocks, but now it’s almost impossible to assume the attackers won’t get bigger thanks to Heron’s Grace Champion. Not only that, but later in the game, this card will be able to create gigantic life swings, making it almost impossible to race any Humans deck. Expect Heron’s Grace Champion to see play, because it most definitely will!

Todd Swipes Left:

Heron’s Grace Champion might need six months or a year to really shine. With Collected Company being the premier four-drop in green decks, it is hard to argue in favor of a card like this…right now. In the future, I could see a promising relationship growing between two (or three, or four) consenting humans, and it just might be beautiful.

Right now, she’s loving life(link) and doing her own thing. She just needs to wait until Collected Company is out of the picture before she makes her move.

Brad Swipes Left:

I’ve been hearing a lot of chatter recently that most of the accounts on this site are bots ruled by Emrakul, and I’m getting the vibe that this is one of them. The details this card put up about itself are extremely cryptic, and I have a sneaking suspicion that going out with this card might end with me pledging my allegiance to the one true ruler of the Multiverse.

That said, this card might seem some fringe play in decks that can’t deal with planeswalkers, but that’s about it. I personally wouldn’t want to build a deck that needed to use this to beat planeswalkers, since my plan is to use this to kill them. When I don’t have access to this, I will most likely die, and when they don’t have a planeswalker, this card will rot in my hand. Not the exchanges I like to make playing Magic. I would rather stay proactive and use combat damage to send those sparked sorcerers to the ground. Not imprison them, because we all know how well that works out in the Magic Multiverse.

Todd Swipes Left:

She’s got a lot of baggage. Carrying around a giant monster that eats entire planes of existence has to be hard on her, but hey, that’s what you sign up for when you have kids. I met the little guy on our second date, and he’s quite the handful. If you like kids and are up for a challenge, Imprisoned in the Moon might just be the one for you.

Brad Swipes Left:

I don’t think I want to be around someone who fights fire with literal fire. It’s fine to be passionate about one’s stance, but incinerating those who disagree with you sounds very immature. I’m looking for a much more adult-based relationship at this time.

This card seems great on paper, but I don’t know how well it will play out right now in Standard. We will need Dromoka’s Command and Hangarback Walker to rotate out before we see expensive burn spells being good. Until then, we just have to understand that red cards aren’t that good right now and that’s okay. Soon enough they will once again be burning our faces off.

Todd Swipes Right:

This card could be something special. I’m not locking it in just yet, but I like what I see: good cost, with the ability to pay a little extra for a big effect. While Collective Defiance might seem a little awkward when compared to Exquisite Firecraft side-by-side, you have to understand that this one is a little more complex.

Sometimes your hand is bad, and you want to take a mid-game mulligan on top of killing that creature. All you gotta do is pay one extra mana. A burn spell that allows you to use excess mana to up its effect later in the game reminds me a lot of Burst Lightning, and I was always a huge fan of that card.

Single Magic Player. Looking For Eldritch Moon Standard Deck.

Todd says: I’ve never used Tinder before this. Hell, I haven’t dated in over a decade. I’m out of the game, but I’m looking to get back in. And if there is one statement that has held true throughout my life, it’s that you don’t ever quit Magic cards, you just take a break.

I’m looking to get back on the horse. I got shafted pretty badly by Chandra and her stupid Goggles, and it has taken some time for me get up the courage to get out there and start slinging cardboard again. I’m new to this, and I’m willing to answer any questions you might have. I’ll open up to the right card or deck. I just need a little prodding.

Roll Tide.