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Rats Live On No Evil Star

That’s right folkses, Rats is the hawt new faunky thing that everyone wants to get a piece of. As I mentioned last week, Tim Aten got the deck from Cedric Phillips after he tore up part of the Last Chance Qualifier field at Pro Tour: Philadelphia. Aten then blazed up the Invitational with a Rats deck, and the message boards, forums and mailing lists across the internet lit up with people all saying “OMG, cool!” However, if you in turn wish to play the deck next weekend at Regionals, you’re gonna have to do better than just taking the deck from Aten and Phillips and running it out of the box like you did when you finally got Party of Five: Season 3 on DVD. That’s where I come in…

“Rats are gross.” At least that’s what my wife says, anyway. What does Dictionary.com say? It says “server down, please try again later.” Hmmm, how about UrbanDictionary.com? “Short for hoodrats ‘Look at my rat like she act brand new, Hey boo, how are you? Yeah, cool, now tally-o your ass back across the room’ – obie” Uh. Okay, what to StarCityGames.com readers say? They say “Yay Rats I’m gonna play Rats at Regionals OMG LOL!~”


That’s right folkses, Rats is the hawt new faunky thing that everyone wants to get a piece of. As I mentioned last week, Tim Aten got the deck from Cedric Phillips after he tore up part of the Last Chance Qualifier field at Pro Tour: Philadelphia. Aten then blazed up the Invitational with a Rats deck, and the message boards, forums and mailing lists across the internet lit up with people all saying “omg cool”, “I’m sorry, did you say there’s a new deck for Standard?” and “does a Nekrataal can kill?”


However, if you in turn wish to play the deck next weekend at Regionals, you’re gonna have to do better than just taking the deck from Aten and Phillips and running it out of the box like you did when you finally got Party of Five: Season 3 on DVD. Basically, you won’t be alone in doing so. There is no way the deck can be classed as rogue any more, and for good reason. The deck is both fun to play and quite effective. Here is the list that Aten ran for reference:


Invitational Rats

4 Blinkmoth Nexus

1 Shizo, Death’s Storehouse

18 Swamp


4 Nezumi Shortfang

4 Ravenous Rats

4 Skullsnatcher

3 Nezumi Cutthroat

4 Chittering Rats

4 Nekrataal

3 Throat Slitter

3 Ink-Eyes, Servant of Oni


4 Aether Vial

4 Umezawa’s Jitte


Sideboard:

2 Distress

3 Echoing Decay

3 Terror

4 Damping Matrix

3 Cranial Extraction


Bonus Rundown on Above Deck Content!:

What does it do? How does it work? Ravenous Rats and Chittering Rats are no strangers in the tag-team ring. While Ravenous has been around for some time, it hasn’t done anything particularly impressive outside of having three different artworks available to choose from. When Chittering finally came along with it’s much needed redundancy, Ravenous stood up and let our a lusty “aw yeah bay-beee!” and together they danced around the fringe of the Standard metagame. They didn’t make much of a dent in the overall scheme of things however, as they really lacked the punch needed to really make their mark.


(Hay guys, I’m a 2/2 LOL!)


By the time Betrayers of Kamigawa rolled around, most people had forgotten that there was a Dastardly Duo waiting in the sidelines to bust up some hands, just hoping for some way to be reused and abused. Ninjutsu stepped in, or more like sidled silently in along the wall, and once it was standing right behind them whispered “hay buddy, whut’s a come into play ability? Kekeke.”


That gave us two teams. The Come Into Play Team of Ravenous Rats, Chittering Rats and Nekrataal. (The Assassin, while not particularly good at dealing with cards in hand like the first two, would quite nicely clean up what made it into play afterward.) And backing them up was the Ninjutsu Crew of Skullsnatcher, Throat Slitter and Ink-Eyes. In much the same way that Chittering Rats provided redundancy for Ravenous Rats, Throat Slitter bulked up the creature-kill count started by Nekrataal, and Skullsnatcher joined Nezumi Cutthroat as a two-power shin-nibbler. The Cutthroat also managed to get a few of those Ninjutsu guys past otherwise challenging blockers such as Meloku, Arc-Slogger and Iwamori.


In other words, what these guys lacked in stature, and they really did lack it all in stature, they made up for with synergy. But just in case some stature was needed, and it sure was in the case of opponents sporting Mountains, Ink-Eyes could crash in to cash out those Red players in no time.


It was beautiful, and it was subtle.


Unfortunately, subtle is out the window when it comes to Regionals this year. Those Cutthroats, Nekrataals and Thoat Slitters aren’t nearly as good when your opponent has their own Black creatures staring back at you for a start, and there’s always the fact that there’s a whole new set to contend with, too. Thankfully for our Ratty chums, Saviors of Kamigawa came to the party with a fully loaded keg o’ goodness. I don’t use the word “keg” lightly here, either, because the guy I’m talking about very much resembles a keg wielding a large hammer.


And yeah, with Skull Collector, we’re talking anything but subtle.


Ninjutsu tricks have style, grace and poise. Small Rat-like creatures darting into yonder Red-Zone, and daintily leaping back into your grasp for imminent reapplication of come into play abilities. Skull Collector pick up Rat, Skull Collector smash, Rat come down again. Smash, Rat. Smash Rat. Durr.


While you could argue that the interaction between Skull Collector and any one of the twelve come into play creatures in the deck is quite synergistic, the problem is you’re approaching the analysis in a linguistic manner only really suitable for discourse on the subject of creatures with the Ninjutsu ability. This is Skull Collector we’re talking about here, and he like to smash.


Gone is the need for Rats with fear, gone is the need to throw away rats to ensure one of them is unblocked. Just play a Rat or a Nekrataal every turn and be done with it. There’s no need to play a six-mana regenerating fatty, when this three mana regenerating 3/3 will tide you over quite nicely in the face of Incoming Fat Guys.


(However, Ink-Eyes is sooo cool and awesome and effective, I suggest running a couple anyway.)


Narrowing down the deck with the addition of Skull Collector more room for interesting innovation and ideas, such as what is found in this deck played by Patrick Dierbach to a third place finish at the Berlin Regionals recently.


German Rats

14 Swamp

4 Blinkmoth Nexus

1 Shizo, Death’s Storehouse

1 Glimmervoid

4 Chrome Mox




4 Ravenous Rats

4 Nezumi Cutthroat

4 Chittering Rats

4 Nekrataal


1 Throat Slitter

3 Ink-Eyes, Servant of Oni



4 Aether Vial

4 Umezawa’s Jitte

4 Phyrexian Arena

3 Persecute

1 Cranial Extraction


Sideboard:

1 Glimmervoid

4 Nezumi Shortfang

3 Distress

4 Viridian Shaman

3 Rend Flesh


Dierbach has forgone the Skullsnatchers and moved the Shortfangs to the sideboard to make room for Phyrexian Arena and Persecute, making the deck less Aggro/Control and more Control/Aggro. This has left him with very few ways to reuse the Rats, but the simple addition of Skull Collector (Derf Derf) over Cutthroat will make this deck that much stronger and less reliant on the Ninjas.


One thing to note. If you happen to play a build similar to Dierbach’s, altering it to replace the Snatchers with Skull Collectors (Duh which way to enemy?), make sure you also consider swapping the Arenas for Night’s Whispers. Otherwise the curve will sit firmly and heavily at three mana instead of spreading it between two and three, as it should be.


OMG Emergency Pretend Regionals is Tomorrow Segment!!~


If I woke up tomorrow and discovered that I was that darn bad at organizing my time that Regionals would be due to start in just over three hours, instead of a week away, this is how I would hastily build my Rats deck.


15 Swamp

4 Blinkmoth Nexus

1 Shizo, Death’s Storehouse

4 Chrome Mox


3 Nezumi Shortfang

4 Ravenous Rats

4 Chittering Rats

4 Skull Collector (Hi there Rat friend, hay where he go? Oh there you is. Where you go again?)

4 Nekrataal

2 Throat Slitter

2 Ink-Eyes, Servant of Oni


2 Pithing Needle

4 Aether Vial

4 Umezawa’s Jitte

3 Phyrexian Arena


The remaining Ninjas continue to provide redundancy for the decks key Creature-Removal and Fat-Stick components. Throat Slitter being Nekrataals number five and six, and Ink-eyes being an extra two Skull Collectors (Hay Inky-Eyesy, are you my Mommy?).


Aten’s original list featured four Damping Matrix in the sideboard, which were instrumental in shutting down Olivier Ruel Vedalken Shackles during the Invitational. In doing so, Aten sacrificed his access to Aether Vial and Umezawa’s Jitte, both of which are very important and powerful cards. Saviors brings us a perfect replacement for the Matrix in Pithing Needle. Not only can it stop the opposing Shackles, but it can do so without wrecking the Rat deck’s artifact presence, and at a third of the mana cost, too. If I was pressed for time, like I’m pretending I am, I would squeeze a couple of those puppies into the maindeck because of their versatility alone.


As far as the remaining 13 sideboard slots are concerned, I have to admit that I would be hesitant in running Dierbach’s “splashing monkeys” plan. I would however, be itching to run some Swords of Light and Shadow for the mirror match, and any possible White Weenie matchups (it is Regionals, after all). Throw in some Terrors to help suppress Aggro Red’s Arc-Sloggers and Slith Firewalkers, and a few Cranial Extractions to bolster the discard suite ready for Tooth and Nail, and I should get something like this:


2 Pithing Needle

3 Terror

4 Sword of Light and Shadow

3 Cranial Extraction

2 Okiba-Gang Shinobi

1 Throat Slitter


The Shinobi simply because it has “Shinobi” in it’s name, and because it’s looks like it could bust some nuts verses the various control decks you could expect to see.


How would I be looking to sideboard? For the mirror, I would obviously (obviously) be cutting those Nekrataals and Throat Slitters as quick as possible to make room for those Tasty Swords and a couple of Cranial Extractions. The Extractions would really just be functioning as a pair of wild cards to see if I can’t remove a crucial card or two, like opposing Jittes or Skull Collectors (Hay Iwamoriori, is you my Mommy?).


Versus Aggro Red, the Needles and Shortfangs can come out for the Terrors, the Throat Slitter and perhaps a random Sword. Against Green/X the Terrors and Throat Slitter can come in for the Shortfangs, and possibly an Arena. For Mono-Blue Control, the Shinobis and remaining Needles can come in for the Jittes. Because while the Jitte is an amazing card, it really doesn’t pull its weight against a Mono Blue player.


And lastly, probably the most important of them all, the Tooth and Nail matchup. The first thing you have to bare in mind is the fact that they may pull a transformational sideboard like Terry Soh to fight any incoming Cranial Extractions. This doesn’t mean you shouldn’t side them in, because you want to ensure they’re not casting it, either way. If they are going with the Fats to the Face routine, you’re still going to want some of those removal guys at your disposal, so I suggest sideboarding as follows: Bring in the Extractions and Shinobis, and take out the two Needles, two Throat Slitters and a Phyrexian Arena. This should leave you ready for either approach. You have the discard to lock them down if they are going for the Tooth and Nail option, which you have to admit, is pretty ballsy in the face of Extraction, and the Nekrataals to knock off any Iwamoris come out the tell the Skull Collector (Iwamori, youse owe me some Child Support) that he is in fact not the Paternal Guardian that he’s looking for.


*looks at clock and does a comical double-take*


Right, that’s it. This is officially the latest that I can remember I’ve stayed up writing one of these things, so I’d best be off to bed. I’m due to get up in around two hours, and that can’t be good. With any luck, I’ll manage to squeeze out another one of these tirades before Regionals actually starts for real, not for pretend like, so you’ve got that to look forward to as well. Or should that be “hide in fear” from? I dunno.


So take care, and don’t stay up past your bed time, or papa Iwamori will totally like, ground you for a whole week, or summink.


EDIT: Why is it “Iwamori of the Open Fist” if his fists are closed on the card?


 


(blisterguy)


 


(beep)