[Note: Please don’t spoil things for other readers and commenters for the sake of a throwaway joke. Storytelling is largely about emotional response. Don’t take that away for someone else who hasn’t yet experienced what you have. By default, this article contains some implicit spoilers about the Game of Thrones story, but they are intentionally minimal. Thank you.]

Sadly, Game of Thrones is over for now. The storytelling cultural landmark of our time is taking one last breather before coming back with more death, sex, destruction, and betrayal than ever before! Actually, it can’t, because lots of people are dead. So it’ll have that stuff, but…you know, less of it. Probably.

Here are some decks.

Catelyn Stark (Autumn Willow) — Danny West

•

Commander

•

Article Deck

•

Aug 24, 2017

BUY DECK

Commander (1)

1

Autumn Willow

Creature (23)

1

Argothian Enchantress

1

Baru, Fist of Krosa

1

Boreal Druid

1

Byway Courier

1

Dreampod Druid

1

Dungrove Elder

1

Hornet Nest

1

Jade Mage

1

Kalonian Twingrove

1

Kessig Cagebreakers

1

Kodama of the North Tree

1

Master of the Wild Hunt

1

Nylea, God of the Hunt

1

Ohran Viper

1

Sacred Wolf

1

Sylvan Safekeeper

1

Thragtusk

1

Tireless Tracker

1

Ulvenwald Tracker

1

Witchstalker

1

Wolfbriar Elemental

1

Wolfir Silverheart

1

Yavimaya Elder

Planeswalker (1)

1

Garruk, Primal Hunter

Artifact (11)

1

Coldsteel Heart

1

Expedition Map

1

Lightning Greaves

1

Magnifying Glass

1

Mana Crypt

1

Scroll Rack

1

Slate of Ancestry

1

Sol Ring

1

Sword of Feast and Famine

1

Sword of Fire and Ice

1

Worn Powerstone

Enchantment (18)

1

Ancestral Mask

1

Asceticism

1

Bear Umbra

1

Blanchwood Armor

1

Canopy Cover

1

City of Solitude

1

Feed the Pack

1

Fists of Ironwood

1

Greater Good

1

Keen Sense

1

Khalni Heart Expedition

1

Primal Vigor

1

Raised by Wolves

1

Rancor

1

Sylvan Library

1

Ulvenwald Mysteries

1

Vow of Wildness

1

Wolfcaller's Howl

Sorcery (8)

1

Cultivate

1

Enshrined Memories

1

Grizzly Fate

1

Harmonize

1

Howl of the Night Pack

1

Into the North

1

Seasons Past

1

Skyshroud Claim

Instant (5)

1

Hunter's Insight

1

Moonlight Hunt

1

Predator's Howl

1

Second Harvest

1

Worldly Tutor

Land (33)

1

Ancient Tomb

1

Command Tower

1

Gaea's Cradle

1

Homeward Path

1

Mouth of Ronom

1

Okina, Temple to the Grandfathers

1

Oran-Rief, the Vastwood

1

Path of Ancestry

1

Scrying Sheets

23

Snow-Covered Forest

1

Yavimaya Hollow

Copy Decklist

BUY DECK

Who: Catelyn Stark, Lady of Winterfell

Advertised Occupation: Mother and Diplomat

Actual Occupation: Enhancement Talent

The Deck: Catelyn lives in the woods with her wood friends, so they’re all about Wolves and Trees and such. She’s not much on power or strategy, so she pretty much wants to hang out by herself with her people and be left alone. Now, you can still win with this deck by putting an Aura on a Sacred Wolf or Dungrove Elder, but the more likely outcome is that you get ignored entirely and then die to someone playing something smarter or more powerful, like Cyclonic Rift or Jackal Pup.

Who: The High Sparrow, Leader of King’s Landing’s Largest Religious Movement

Advertised Occupation: Saint and Spirit Guide

Actual Occupation: Shoe Condemner

The Deck: Don’t even look, heathen! Reading decklists is a filthy, filthy crime!

Who: Drogo, Conquering Illiterate

Advertised Occupation: Horse Whisperer

Actual Occupation: Horse Yeller

The Deck: Gather your Warriors and your weapons and start grunting! The Khal is followed by those who follow power, so it’s a shame you can’t play with the Power 9 in this format. It’s just as well. The Khal would probably laugh and tear them up. Weapons, deities, tribespeople. The equation is quite simple. Laugh in the gore of your enemies as your trample them. I’m guessing the Dothraki do have a word for “trample.”

Who: Ygritte, Freckled Barbarian

Advertised Occupation: Human Pin Cushion Maker

Actual Occupation: Profound Romantic Meme Generator

The Deck: It was hard to make this deck different from the last one. I don’t mean to sound prejudiced, but exiled northern winter peoples with lots of fur and battle axes look a lot like horse-mounted bearded mascara-wearers that live in desert tents. I’m not racist. I have several Dothraki friends.

The one bonus thing about this bunch if that you can use Giants! For some reason (don’t explain it to me, lore guy), Giants pretty much only live beyond the wall. I don’t know. Maybe they just like the freezing weather. I mean, people like living in Canada, right? Hey oh! Just kidding. I like Canada! They have some hockeys.

Who: Cersei, Relatable Protagonist

Advertised Occupation: Stay-at-Home Mom

Actual Occupation: Martin Shkreli

The Deck: Ah yes, the thousand-yard sneer herself. If you want to turn your next Commander roundtable into a Game of Thrones-style throat-cutting, I recommend picking up a few boxes of Conspiracy: Take the Crown. Based on what we’re seeing here, Cersei is the only one of this bunch that actually wants to be the monarch mechanically. We need the next set to have puppeteers and masterminds that force others to become the monarch. Maybe we do and I just didn’t see them. I miss lots of important things when looking through Gatherer.

…

…Shame!

Who: Ramsay Bolton, Lord of Hoozawhatsit

Advertised Occupation: Squirrel Microwaver

Actual Occupation: Martin Shkreli’s Brother, the One Who Didn’t “Turn Out Well”

The Deck: Everything Ramsay touches or governs turns into a North Korean press release, so his deck is filled with bad activities, Rats, and more bad activities. If you haven’t seen the show yet, Ramsay is the character that most frequently makes people gag. Also, why are you trapped in 2012? Can you hear us in there?! Blink three times if you’re safe!

Who: Daenerys Stormborn, Breaker of Chains, Rightful Leader of the Andals and the First Men, Protector of the Realm, Hardee’s Employee of the Month

Advertised Occupation: Good Person.

Actual Occupation: Bad Person, but Since We’re Grading on a Curve in this Endless Bloodshot Hellscape, I Guess She’ll Do.

The Deck: There are only three Dragons because there are only three Dragons. If you just load it up with more Dragons than she actually has, what are you even doing? Show some restraint, man! She has lots of Warriors, Soldiers, and other handsome men and women advising her. None of them can explain to me why she’s supposed to be the hero. She, the one who has commited endless self-serving murder and unspeakable human atrocities in the name of a bloodline and who—oh, what’s that? Oh, right, her hair is pretty. Fair enough!

There’s a special place in hell for people who think her actual name is “Khaleesi” after seven seasons.