This week on SCG Daily we are featuring a series of special interviews covering the various types of Magic cards. The hosts are guest celebrities, and the interviewees are Planeswalkers or experts on the Magical Realms. Today’s guest interviewer is HBO’s Bill Maher.
This week we are hearing more rumblings from the Ravnica, with additional Guild lands making their appearance. The lands themselves are not only the stages for these conflicts, but some are facilitating combat or even entering the fray themselves. This is not a new occurrence, however. At several times in the past, lands have become involved in regional conflicts, and even participated in battles directly. To put all this in perspective, it is my pleasure to welcome the noted political geographer and Secretary General of the Royal Geographical Society of Great Britain, Sir Cecil Ward Cuthbert-Hollingsworth. Sir Cecil, welcome to the program.
Good evening.
Sir Cecil, how long have you been interested in the geography?
All my life I have been fascinated with maps, but my career really took off when I became part of the Arabian Knights survey team, traveling by Camel from the Pyramids to the City of Brass and eventually crossing the Desert along all four of the major leylines.
Later, I headed the teams that catalogued all of the many Forests, Plains, Mountains and Swamps in the various Realms. It was exhausting work, but I loved it.
Didn’t you take part in the voyages that plotted the various Islands?
No, alas, I suffer from mal de mer – seasickness. I did make the voyage to the Island of Wak-Wak, though. It was agony, but worth it.
How exactly do you go about mapping an area? Are the boundaries distinct?
Aside from shorelines, the boundaries are almost totally arbitrary – and the lands blend into one another. Look at the region running between the Alan Pollack Forest through the Llanowar Wastes into the Spencer Swamp. You can hardly find a line on the ground – or even a clear change of terrain. You start out tripping over roots in the Pollack Woods, and eventually find yourself tripping over soggy roots in the Pollack Swamp – but you can barely tell one from the other, except that one is slightly damper. Even though you cannot see them, however, the boundary areas are always the most powerful.
Why is that?
Throughout the plains, the lands are infused with power and magic. That makes them unique and potent – and gives them a sort of identity. The edges, however, are not clearly defined – instead they have some of the power of both neighboring lands. They partake of a dual nature.
Is that what gives rise to the dual lands?
Sometime yes, sometimes no. Whenever two or more colors converge, the result is typically some form of chaos and tension. Most commonly, the lands become difficult to handle, and the result is a painland, like the Llanowar Wastes I mentioned before. Even areas like the Overgrown Tomb are a form of painland. In other cases, the lands display alternate identities, having to lie fallow after either type exerts itself. The Pinecrest Ridge is a familiar example of this phenomenon.
In very rare instances, however, the two natures of the land can co-exist in perfect harmony. The result is a true dual land, such as a Taiga or Underground Sea – and those become the most powerful and valuable lands of all.
I’m surprised you consider those more valuable than something like the Library of Alexandria. I always thought that was the most valuable piece of real estate around.
In one respect, it is – but to a geographer, individual buildings, and even cities if they don’t cover many hectares, are just points that define the map. We don’t think about them, except as aids to defining the things that do matter. That said, I have to concede that you could buy practically every bit of Mercadia for what it would cost to own a single wing of the Library.
I expect you would have to put the dockside slums, like Seafarer’s Quay, at the other extreme. That’s a useless, valueless piece of real estate if ever there was one.
You mentioned painlands, but we have historical examples of lands that can be even more harmful than that, don’t we?
Yes, indeed. My first experience of that was in crossing the Desert – I mean, the Camels were immune, but we were not. I have also seen even more dangerous lands, such as Rath’s Edge.
In the recent news, we have seen reports of we have also seen lands actually entering combat. Is that a new development?
Not at all, not at all. This goes way back. I believe the first “combat land,” if you will, was created when Mishra used his factories as siege weapons. Later we had Treetop Villages, Ghitu Encampments, even Nantuko Monasteries, all equipped for war. In fact, I consider a Restless Tomb just more of the same. Nothing new there.
Just one more question, before we go to New Rules. How do you feel about those people who have a great dislike for particular lands? You keep seeing games seeking to refuse people with counterspells, or burn, or land destruction. Are those people who hate Mountains, or Islands, or whatever, just bigots?
Yes, I’m afraid so. Even if they dislike some of the things that the lands enable, such as the Counterspells that are endemic to the Islands, they should not hate the lands themselves. Islands are beautiful terrain, and harbor a plethora of wondrous flying creatures. Mountains can be stunning, and create unforgettable vistas. Anyone disdaining them purely because of the spells they enable is, indeed, a bigot.
As for land destruction – that is a totally different thing. It is a blasphemy and an unmitigated evil. The Royal Geographic Society has often stated its complete and utter condemnation of land destruction in all its forms.
Indeed. Well, Sir Cecil, I thank you very much for your time, and I hope you can stick around for the panel. Now, however, it’s time for New Rules.
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First, take a look at the new Guilds in Guildpact: Izzet, Gruul, Orzhov. What sort of names are Izzet and Gruul? Double letters? It’s like they had to find five letters, but could only think of four. They need help.
New Rule: If you can’t think of a letter, use “k.” Izket. Grukl. Isn’t that better?
Next, I saw someone playing a complete Eminent Domain deck in the Casual Play New Players room on Magic Online. A hundred dollars worth of lands, Wildfire, counterspells, and Icy Manipulator… against kids in the New Players room? I don’t think so.
New Rule: If you have to play n00bs to get a win, play something as brainless as you are. Like Boros.
Finally, I’m tired of reading about how hard it is to get a deck together online, and how some author has to play a suboptimal deck. I mean, come on, you can buy a playset of everything in Ravnica for under $750. That’s peanuts.
The final new rule: No whining!