Jingle Bells
Mike Aten Smells
Geordie Laid an Egg
Nick Eisel Lost To Ken Krouner
And Somebody Qualified For Kobe
We attempted to find Christmas cheer in Tim’s article, but we are not miracle workers.
Metagame/hate decks are something I never recommend for the reason that they aren’t very powerful – and even if they are, they usually don’t even approach the power level of the targeted decks. Despite effective hosers, the lack of inherent power is most visible in match-ups outside the scope of its hate. Another risk is that you may not even play the deck you are supposed to be hosing. The second reason is that in degenerate formats, more powerful decks have the best chance of just being more broken and faster than another incredibly powerful deck.
In essence, this deck does what Baron Harkonnen did back in 1997. It tries to devote itself to just making sure that the opponent does not win. When you play Chronoscepter, your basic plan is this:
If you are looking for a completely rogue creation to play both before and after the Bannings, don’t miss this article!
Thinking about the coffee is taking my mind off my son, who seems to be coming down with the flu. He was up and down all night coughing and crying. Consequently, so was I. His mother insisted I go play this morning. I’m probably not in the best frame of mind for Magic, but I have been looking forward to this tournament. For the umpteenth time I check my cell phone to make sure it is on in case she calls.
That’s when the squirrel jumps out from nowhere.
Has there been a more apt moniker for a deck than Red Deck Wins? It’s like the flavor text for Goblin Offensive – a perfect fit. All it does is lay a few creatures, lock down your land for a turn or two and beat you about the head and shoulders until dead. In the Extended environment before Pro Tour: New Orleans, this is what passed for”blazing speed.” Then came New Orleans, and suddenly, a deck capable of a turn 4 kill was”too slow.”
Thankfully, the format came to its senses as 21% of the Day 2 participants in Anaheim were running some form of the deck…
I was looking forward to Extended Season, perhaps breaking out some old favorite from last year, or a build that did well at Worlds. New Orleans changed all that. I’m going to enjoy this Holiday treat that ends January 1st and I hope you will too. People have complained loudly about the format, and now they have their wish. Take advantage of the opportunity to play with some disgusting decks in a competitive environment before the bannings take effect.
Okay, Randy Buehler said in his article commenting on the most recent bannings that he viewed Oath making the list as a lifetime achievement award. In my experience, achievement is not rewarded with forced retirement. Granted, the card is one hundred percent abuseable and there have been many ways to build a decent deck around it, but I don’t see a need to bench it. Randy also indicated that it never dominated, but that its very existence heavily influenced the environment.
So does the existence of Counterspell. Whoopdee frickin’ doo. Actually, a solid argument could be made that the existence of Psychatog has more influence over the Extended environment than Oath of Druids ever did, and that rat bastard is still legal.
With the evolutionary shot-in-the-arm of Mirrodin, Extended had turned into a monstrous format. Wielding bone-crushing brutality and terrifying speed, the top decks tore up lesser creations with the savagery of Fast Mana and Broken Tutor Effects. Stax, Tinker, and Seeeeething Gobvantage thundered and roared across the landscape, with Tog occasionally darting in to take down weaker and unprepared players.
Then one day, a bright DCI light blazed across the sky and hit the format like an Extinction Level Event. The impact crater marked the passing of the Power decks, but also marked the ascendance of the smaller, more flexible and fair decks to finally have their day. The format has chilled and it’s time for the shrews to take over.
Playtesting began with me trying to learn how to play Kai’s Tinker deck he listed on Brainburst. Tragically, I somehow forgot that Kai no longer plays decks that normal mortals can grok. I was doing alright with the deck, but it felt like I never had anything locked away. I never drew the friggin’ Upheavals unless they were in my opening hand, Bosh always ended up in my damned hand so I couldn’t Tinker for him… I just wasn’t getting it. Even when I did get my win conditions on the board, the win never seemed inevitable.
I’m a sketchy player, people… inevitability of winning is important. One-turn kill? Yes please, thank you!
This deck is much better than you think. My testing for New Orleans saw this deck perform insanely well against Psychatog, and pretty well against both versions of the Goblin Charbelcher deck (Mana Severance and Goblin Recruiter). It suffered against Red Deck Wins, which I didn’t expect to see in huge numbers, and The Rock gave it a tight game with its early disruption.
So, that’s the good stuff. Now, onto the bad stuff. The deck loses to Tinker. Very, very badly. Bye now!
Wait a minute… Tinker has been banned, you say? Well, sing hosannas!
Come January 1st, Extended is going to be a very different format. The most recent banned list has torn the format asunder, laying waste to the staple decks in the environment. The last banned list got rid of Reanimator and Frantic Search-based combos, and this one puts the screws to Tinker, Belcher, Hermit, Goblin, and Oath decks.
It should be obvious to all, that decks unaffected by the last two banned lists (like Tog and Rock) will be powerhouses in the new Extended. The interesting question for deck designers like myself is, can we build new decks or revamp the “dead” decks in such a way that they are actually competitive?
I am sure I will not be the only person to mention that the recent bannings do some serious harm to Tinker decks. The banning of Tinker and Grim Monolith also hurt the Mana Severance/Goblin Charbelcher decks and even the Mind’s Desire/Twiddle deck. Cutting Oath of Druids gets rid of Scepter-Oath, and even some classics like TurboLand. The elimination of Goblin Recruiter eliminates the combo-Goblins decks. Finally, no Hermit means he won’t be Angry any more.
So the bannings may have gotten rid of several Combo decks, but don’t think that combo has left the building. There are a score of other combo or combo-ish decks that have potential. I’ll start by listing some of the more obscure possibilities, and then move on to the mainstream decks.
If you’re reading this, then you either really, really like my stuff or you are fairly interested in Aluren. For your sake, I hope it’s the latter. In any case, I’m going to stop taking dictation from the tape recorder and give it to you straight, like a normal writer. I’ve been reading a lot of forum threads on Extended lately. I’ve also been sitting in on conversations in real life and on the net about the format. One thing I’ve noticed is that nobody seems to know anything about Aluren. At least, nobody who’s talking. This has upset me to the point that I’m prepared to write in paragraphs to try and pass on my vast store of infinite knowledge about the slowest (good) combo deck in Extended.
Before we get started, let’s talk about the deck itself. Relatively few articles have been written about Twiddle Desire, and most people are dismissing it as a viable deck for PTQs. There is good reason for this, since it is one of the hardest decks to play, and is not as rewarding as I would like it to be in terms of supporting good play. Simply put, the average player should not just pick up this deck and go to town expecting to get a turn 2 kill consistently. It isn’t going to happen.
Even for experienced players Twiddle Desire does not win on turn 2 25% of the time. Not even close. It’s far better.
